Stetsons, Spurs, and Stilettos

MilSpouse Friday Fill-In

2012-02-10T14:00:00.004-06:00

Another week has come and gone, so it's time for one of my favorite weekly posts (especially now that it's back)! With it being Friday, it's time for another round of MilSpouse Friday Fill-ins! If you haven't joined in on your blog, visit Wife of A Sailor's page to join in! Feel free to answer the questions in the comments section below.

This weeks questions are:

1. What is your favorite winter memory?
When I was about 5 or 6, we lived in a very rural area right near a park (it was popular for camping). There was this humongous hill and very few people ever went there. After one huge blizzard, we went sledding on that hill. After a few tries, we had a nice, packed down area and we were flying down the hill. Now, it might be because I was so small then, but that hill was huge and is one of the best memories I ever had. Although one of my worst winter memories comes from a similar time when all the kids piled on an air mattress with me on the bottom and my face slid across the parking lot. Yeah, that wasn't pretty.

2. What is your current favorite TV show?
One show I never miss each week is "Top Chef: Texas." I've always loved seeing the foods they make and the interesting challenges. It always makes me hungry! I have to piggy-back off Wife of a Sailor's answer and also say Big Bang Theory, though I've missed some episodes in there. I still enjoy the reruns!

3. What was your favorite thing that happened in January?
We had our post-deployment Cavalry Ball. I had the chance to party the night away with my gorgeous husband, the Mr., but also spend a lot of time with my best friends before everyone begins moving their separate ways. I never get tired of getting dressed up and dancing with the hubs!

4. What is the best sound in the world to you?
Laughter. I feel like sometimes people get so wrapped up in current issues in their lives and get in a bad mood. Don't let one thing spoil your greatest gift! Dance to a song you love, watch a funny movie or get together with a gaggle of girls and giggle! You'll feel better having done so.

5. What is the biggest lesson you have learned as a MilSpouse (or significant other)?
The biggest lesson for almost every MilSpouse is flexibility. And I don't mean in the bedroom! I used to be an uptight planner. I needed to know when and what time things would happen. If it didn't work how I wanted it to, I would get stressed. Now, I just don't care. I know things are supposed to happen, but I don't need to worry about when — it will happen. Movers will come and move, you'll eventually find a place to live, your husband will (God willing) come home to you, your children will work things out in school, and the list goes on. Worrying about when these things will happen only stresses you out more. Learn to relinquish control — you'll save worrying. And grey hairs!

Copy the questions (and link) to post on your own blog or write your answers in the comments section below!

The end of imminent danger and hostile fire pay for all?

2012-02-07T18:56:00.004-06:00

Last night I saw a few posts on Facebook about the change in imminent danger and hostile fire pay. Depending where you've gotten your facts, you may be misinformed.

Allow me to clear it up for you, in case you're confused.

Hostile fire and imminent danger pay is not going away for everyone, though it is for some. In tightening our belts for the future, cuts have to be made. In the Defense Authorization Act, which passed the House and Senate in December and was signed by President Obama on December 31, 2011, the government decided to change hostile fire and imminent danger pay to a prorated rate.

Here is the section directly from the bill: "(b) HAZARDOUS DUTY PAY.—Section 351(c)(2) of
such title is amended by striking ‘‘receipt of hazardous duty pay,’’ and all that follows and inserting ‘‘receipt of hazardous duty pay—‘‘(A) in the case of hazardous duty pay payable under paragraph (1) of subsection (a), the Secretary concerned shall prorate the payment amount to reflect the duration of the member’s actual qualifying service during the month; and
‘‘(B) in the case of hazardous duty pay payable under paragraph (2) or (3) of sub- section (a), the Secretary concerned may pro-rate the payment amount to reflect the duration of the member’s actual qualifying service during the month.’’. (c) EFFECTIVE DATE.—The amendments made by this section shall take effect on October 1, 2011, and shall apply with respect to duty performed on or after that date."

So what does this mean for our deployed service members? Those who are in an area considered "safe" will no longer receive that pay. If, for whatever reason, the service member enters an area that is "dangerous" and would allow them to make imminent danger and hostile fire pay, they will receive $7.50 per day they are in the area.

Before this law, service members would receive the $225 in extra pay, even if the service member wasn't in a "dangerous" area during the entire month (I put safe and dangerous in quotation marks because there really isn't any such thing as a safe place). So the $7.50 a day rate is sticking with how it was before — the difference is it won't be guaranteed each month.

So is this move good or bad? That depends on your political viewpoint.

I think that some military spouses allow their military support to cloud their vision and, in turn, their thinking. Rather than looking beyond politics and the military, some choose to blindly support the military which blinds rational thinking. I think we all can admit there is waste in military spending. I'll be the first on to admit it.

So let's break it down. Hostile fire and imminent danger pay is not going away. If you serve in an area that is deserving of that pay, you'll get it, but only for the time you're serving there. So why all the outrage?

I've seen some people say the military deserves the extra pay. Of course they do, but the pay used to go to those who weren't in imminent danger or faced with hostile fire. Now, the extra pay will be reserved for those in those sorts of situations, regardless of how long. You're getting paid by the day rather than by the month. Makes sense to me.

I saw one person blaming Obama for the decision (remember, he didn't make the decision unilaterally), even going as far to say, "the guys who make the laws sure as hell shouldn't be able to take things from the military that they themselves have no clue about." Let's not forget that there are veterans serving in Congress. It passed the house with a 238-136 vote. To prove this isn't a political game, Republicans have control of the House. Then it passed the Democrat-controlled Senate before the President signed it.

We all have to remember that cuts need to be made. We're done in Iraq and drawing down in Afghanistan. Like it or not, cuts are going to happen. I think this is one of the least harmful cuts that could have been made.

But please, do everyone a favor — inform yourself before you spout off about what is wrong with a certain governmental decision. Read the primary documents. You'll feel smarter having done so.

What are your thoughts regarding the prorated pay?

What to do when your best friend leaves

2012-02-06T18:38:00.006-06:00

Since all our men have returned from their deployment, I'm reaching that tough time no one really ever talks about...

When your best friend moves away.

My best friend Sherry's husband has received orders to move away to an awesome new post. If you haven't been following me for long, you probably don't recognize her name.

You see, I wasn't friends with Sherry for a while after I moved here. I moved to our post back in April 2010 and didn't have many friends. It took me months. Obviously, the Mr. was deploying in October 2010 so I wasn't prepared to have him gone, especially when I was friendless. As the months turned to weeks, which turned to days, I started getting anxious and nervous for the Mr. to leave. I wasn't ready to be alone.

The day after the guys left, after I had spent most of the night crying, Sherry sent me a text. "We're going trick-or-treating with the SCOs wife, so if you want to come along, you're welcome. I'll pick you up." So I weighed my options. Sit around at home and allow my face to puff up, or get my butt in gear, put a smile on my face and have a night to take my mind off things. I opted for the latter.

And so our friendship began. I spent the first two weeks of the deployment at Sherry's house with her two sons. Every. Single. Day. I would often come over in the morning and stay well beyond dinner. She gave me the support I needed and helped keep my mind off the scary bits of deployment. I'll admit, most of our nights revolved around some good wine to make the waiting easier.

Eventually, our group of friends blossomed, but Sherry was always available when I needed her. When it came time for my R&R with the Mr., she was excited for me. Same when it was her hubby's turn. When we both needed a break to get away, we planned a trip to the beach in North Carolina, packed our bags and drove together. We spent a week there without a care.

When we planned a ladies night in to play games, eat food and drink some wine and Sherry couldn't make it because of her kiddos, we took the party to her house. When our husbands came back, we went to the welcome home ceremony together, waited together and thanked each other for the support.

So now comes the time for her to leave.

My grandmother, a 20-year military spouse, always said there are no goodbyes in the Army. It's always a "see you later." I think that's about right. It's a part of this life, but nothing says you'll never be around each other again.

So what do you do when your best friend leaves? You make the most of your time left. You both vow to keep in touch (and actually aim at doing so — phone calls are ok). And lastly, you try to make the time to see one another, even if it's via Skype, short trips or a long vacation (which I recommend, even if children are in tow).

That being said, I'm going to miss my best friend. I know Sherry and I will never fully lose touch, though.

I mean, I have to have vacation plans, right?

Bringing Phoenix Home

2012-01-30T11:48:00.004-06:00

I don't normally advertise on my blog for fundraising, but I caught wind of a great fundraiser and I want to raise awareness of it. Bringing Phoenix Home is designed to bring a soldiers dog back from Afghanistan.

A unit of EOD soldiers found a dog during their tour in Afghanistan and were able to smuggle it onto their compound in country. Since then, one of the soldiers has been caring for it. Now that they're prepping to leave, the soldier is trying to find a way to bring Phoenix home. Here is the story in his own words:

"I've been taking care of a female dog we call Phoenix for the last 10 months. We meet Phoenix on a remote patrol base where she had befriended the infantry soldiers at the gate. The unit was unable to keep her and was going to have to euthanize her due to health concerns (rabies is a large problem in Afghanistan). We happened to be passing through after disposing of an IED in the area when we saw the puppy. After hearing that they would have to euthanize her we decided to take her with us. Being EOD has certain benefits and one of which is we usually have our own secured compound on our base. So we smuggled the puppy back to our compound where she lived with us for the next ten months. Puppies can be a hand full and a puppy in Afghanistan is no different. It didn’t take long for Phoenix to start exploring her new home and her favorite spot just happened to be the 12 inch gap between the wooden tent floor and the ground below. I’m not sure if it was because she felt secure under there or if it was the 120 degree heat but when she was outside she could always be found under the tent. On several occasions she managed to get herself stuck under there and you would hear her little whine coming from under afoot. When this happened you would have to go to the largest opening under the tent and call for her, she would then wiggle and worm her way out to you covered in dirt. This process was repeated several times until she was eventually too big to fit under our tent. Phoenix was a surprisingly smart pup and quickly learned to sit, shake, catch, lay down and even play dead when shot by a pretend finger gun. Over the last 10 months she has been our rock always there with a smile and those brown doggy eyes. Our unit has been through a lot on this deployment 5 of our 44 soldiers have been sent home with serious injuries from IED blasts and the Infantry Battalion in which we support has sustained several more. Phoenix made copping with those realities a little easier she just so happens to be a great listener. Having a dog around brings a little piece of home too; it’s nice to have something to care for. I spent countless hours outside with her playing catch or wrestling or just chilling out. She truly made this last year easier for me and all the soldiers around her. I think Phoenix brought a little joy to everyone who came in contact with her. As the deployment was winding down we began to think of what would happen to Phoenix when we left and the more we thought about it the more we realized the outlook for Phoenix was not good. A life for a dog outside the walls of our base is not one you would wish on any dog. This dog had now become part of our family and the unknown of whether our replacements would be able or willing to care for her was not good enough. So through the magic of the internet I was able to contact Pam Constable and the Afghan Stray Animal League. Pam quickly jumped to our rescue and we arranged to transport Phoenix to a shelter the organization runs in Kabul. The process was simple really we just had to bribe a local afghan to drive her to Kandahar and then she was flown in a combat zone to Kabul where the group picked her up and brought her to their shelter. I am truly amazed by the work that Pam and her colleagues do on a daily basis and ask for nothing in return these are amazing people. And that brings us to now. Phoenix is waiting in Kabul until we can raise enough money to transport her to the United States. In total the transportation alone is going to be about 3500 dollars. I know that sounds crazy it is a lot of money to spend on one stray afghan dog but Phoenix is so much more than that to me and my fellow soldiers she’s our battle buddy we have literally been shot at together. I cannot and will not leave her here in this place so I ask you for your help anything you can donate to help bring my battle buddy home is greatly appreciated. I will do my best to keep you all updated so check out Phoenix’s Face book page (Phoenix MacAlister) or her blog at http://phoenixeod.blogspot.com/. Thank you all and God Bless."

In case you're wondering, this is not a scam or anything like that. If you follow the The Warrior Wife Warrior Wife, this is a soldier from her wounded husband's unit. In a time where morale has been low with such a high number of wounded in a small unit, why not help to fund Phoenix's way home. Donate what you can — every little bit helps.

As an animal lover myself, I can't imagine caring for a dog and having to leave it behind in a country that doesn't value these animals. The $3,500 sounds like a lot, but they've already raised $725. Raising awareness is the best way to get this puppy home to a family. The Warrior wife knows the family that is willing to take Phoenix. The family cared for the Warrior Wife's dogs after her husband was wounded.

I wasn't going to say anything, but I can't keep my mouth shut

2012-01-17T15:50:00.001-06:00

I’ve been reading a lot of information over the last few days since the video of the Marines surfaced. Media outlets and bloggers alike have shared their opinions on the issue. I’ve tried to stay away from it, but I’ve found that I can’t continue to be quiet. While my opinion may upset some of you, please understand it’s only my opinion and you’re welcome to disagree.

I am behind those leaders who say this video is disgusting and a terrible representation of our armed forces that are over there risking their lives daily.

I understand that I’m not a soldier, airman, sailor or marine and I don’t know the ins and outs of combat. I’ve not been in such a situation, so have zero experience to provide. That doesn’t mean I can’t have an opinion.

A statement was made by Rep. Allen West (R-Fla.) who is a retired Army Lieutenant Colonel. Here is his statement he released to The Weekly Standard:

“I have sat back and assessed the incident with the video of our Marines urinating on Taliban corpses. I do not recall any self-righteous indignation when our Delta snipers Shugart and Gordon had their bodies dragged through Mogadishu. Neither do I recall media outrage and condemnation of our Blackwater security contractors being killed, their bodies burned, and hung from a bridge in Fallujah.

All these over-emotional pundits and armchair quarterbacks need to chill. Does anyone remember the two Soldiers from the 101st Airborne Division who were beheaded and gutted in Iraq?

The Marines were wrong. Give them a maximum punishment under field grade level Article 15 (non-judicial punishment), place a General Officer level letter of reprimand in their personnel file, and have them in full dress uniform stand before their Battalion, each personally apologize to God, Country, and Corps videotaped and conclude by singing the full US Marine Corps Hymn without a teleprompter. As for everyone else, unless you have been shot at by the Taliban, shut your mouth, war is hell.”

According to West, I should shut my mouth since “I’ve never been shot at by the Taliban,” but I respectfully disagree. Just because I haven’t been there doesn’t mean my opinion is less worthy.

Yes, our enemy has not always respected our service member’s bodies and has freely showcased the bodies in disgusting ways. That doesn’t mean we do the same in return. Our service members sometimes look at the enemy as less than human — mistreating our service members' bodies is behavior we expect from our enemy. When someone is less than human we expect them to have no concerns of them. We don’t expect them to act in a positive way or be respectful.

Obviously war is hell — you won’t find someone who disagrees with that. But just because it is a hellish environment does not excuse this behavior.

I’ve read people who wrote about this being the “liberal media.” Almost every media outlet has covered this incident because it’s a significant event.

I’ve also read that this is something that has been a “trend” throughout history. That’s true, but it was before we had rules and conduct in place dealing with an enemy’s body. We’re far removed from leveling and pillaging a city and killing everyone in our wake.

Some have said these Marines were “wounded” and because of the harshness of war, took relief in this act. If these were emotional or unseen wounds, they should have sought help.

I’m sorry, but I can’t allow those reasons to be excuses for their actions. Not only does urinating on a corpse offend the nation we’re helping, it further offends our enemy. It can cause the Afghan people to further separate from accepting U.S. support and assistance (and this has been printed in their news networks as well). This act is what could get their brothers-in-arms killed, with enemy fighters coming back for vengeance and potentially doing worse to our service members’ bodies.

Obviously I know this is not a common practice, but I agree with the punishments and all criticism from the Pentagon and our government. I believe this action is not indicative of our armed forces’ (or the Marine Corps’) teachings or values.

I won’t attack the character of these Marines because it isn’t my place. I don’t know them. I do believe they weren’t in a good place when they acted out and didn’t mean for it to reach so many people. I’m sure they are young guys who didn’t mean to tarnish the reputation of the Marine Corps and genuinely thought the public would never see this.

I spoke with the Mr. about this and he disagrees with my view. I accept his opinion because he’s been in combat, but I still cannot attempt to justify or excuse those actions.
I welcome all your thoughts on the issue, just please remember to be respectful.

Champagne Thursday

2012-01-12T18:43:00.004-06:00

It's finally Thursday which means it's time for me to share what I'm celebrating this week. It doesn't have to be anything truly significant, but something that helps excite your day, past week or upcoming week.

Here is what I'm celebrating this week:

1. I was let out of work today an hour early so the government employees could get a jumpstart to their weekend. Unfortunately, I have to go in for part of the morning tomorrow unlike the government employees. Gotta love being a contractor.

2. I only have a half day tomorrow. Meaning I get to come home and just relax.

3. It's a three-day weekend. Since the Mr. has a 4-day, it means we have some additional time that we don't normally get.

4. Saturday night is date night. It's been a while since we had one. I'm going to cook a good dinner, we'll play a board game and then watch a movie. They don't sound like much to other people, but with him working as XO and working on his Master's, there isn't much time for me to fit in during the week. Date night will be a great chance for us to just focus on each other.

5. I'll get some down time to enjoy a book. I'm not sure what I'll pick up, but it will be nice to read something fun.

What are you celebrating this week?

Writer Wednesday featuring "Hark! A Vagrant!"

2012-01-11T18:12:00.005-06:00

It has been quite some time since I did a "Writer Wednesday." For those of you who don't know, this is when I feature a book I read recently. Now, I'll admit that my reading time has declined significantly since the Mr. came home, but I have a special little gem for today.

Hark! A Vagrant! — Kate Beaton

I read about this book on CNN and added it to my Amazon wishlist shortly before Christmas. My brother ended up buying it for me. I flipped through the first two pages after all the presents were unwrapped. Before I knew it, I had finished the book. It didn't last the whole day!

Beaton is a cartoonist with a degree in history. The comic strips started out as doodles during class time or boredom. Each short comic discusses a historical figure or literature. And believe me, they will get you laughing out loud.

For example, one of the first comics in the book is about the suffragist movement. Instead of them being normal women, Beaton depicts them as "Sex and the City" characters:

I mean, c'mon, read that and try not to laugh.

Her book is chock full of Tesla, the Bronte sisters, comics depicting book covers (hilarious) and so much more. If you're in need of a laugh, I highly recommend it. It's now a coffee table book.

If you don't want to purchase the book, but are interested in viewing her cartoons, visit her website for even more.

Just in case anyone is wondering, I make no money for reviewing the books I choose. They're simply books I enjoy (or hate) and choose to share with my readers.

Food, drinks, dancing and fun makes a great Ball

2012-01-09T18:00:00.004-06:00

Let me start off by saying I adore these functions. Getting the chance to dress up, dance with the Mr., eat good food and have fun is right up my alley. I've also loved searching for the perfect dress and matching it with jewelry for the right amount of sophistication and glitz.

Our post-deployment cavalry ball was Friday night at a resort and casino. It was the same place we had it two years ago before the deployment, but this year it was ten times better.

The Mr. and I got down to the resort around 1 so that I could help decorate the room. I checked in and saw there were plenty of people, so the Mr. and I went up to our room to relax. My best friend, Sherry, showed up around the same time and we decided to have coffee downstairs at the cafe. We needed to wait out the hours before we could get ready.

We dropped in at the bar for a drink, then the girls went up to get ready. Now, I'm terrible at doing hair. I've never been good at it. As a child, I tried to brush my hair and got the brush so tangled in my hair it was cut out. So yeah, me and hair do not mix. She put all the curl in and and I helped curl hers (the one thing I can do). Lucky for her, I didn't even burn her. Score!

I headed back up to my room with the Mr. to do my make-up and get dressed. I pulled my hair in a low ponytail and sprayed it so it looked huge. I put in my big earrings, chunky bracelets and monstrous cocktail ring and was ready to go.

All dressed up and ready to go!

The Mr. was looking pretty good as well.

Now, this is where the ball was much better than last year.

This year, the Mr. and I knew a lot more people. He had worked with a lot of people in the squadron during the deployment and met a lot of the soldiers. While he was gone, I met a lot of the wives from our troop and squadron. Combined? We knew a lot of people. It was such a great feeling mingling with his soldiers and my friends and meeting new people. Unlike a lot of units, our squadron commander and his wife are very low key, so we don't do a receiving line. They prefer to mingle over a cocktail hour, which gives everyone else the same chance.

We entered the ballroom and it was beautiful with dim lighting and candles on the tables. We chit chatted with some of the Mr.'s soldiers before the posting of the colors, the toasts and of course, the grog.

I'm sure everyone is aware of the grog, but for cavalry, it's a huge deal. It's the part everyone looks forward to. I don't even remember all the liquors that went into it. There were funny parts and parts that made everyone cheer. The Mr.'s troop has what they call the "Cav Cock" that has been in the troops for some time (it's some kind of fake rooster with feathers). It even went to Afghanistan with them. That was dropped in the middle of the grog.

The additions to the grog were done through Stetsons, shoes, socks, people spitting the beverage into the grog and other ways.

Because of the extreme drinking of last year, we were only allowed a shot of the grog. As tradition, I took my shot. I instantly wished I hadn't. It's way too many liquors and just way too strong for me. But, it's tradition — I had to.

After dinner and the commander's remarks, the floor opened for dancing. Now, I love to get out on the dance floor and move it. Last year, the Mr. spent most of his time standing around. This time, he was dragging me on the dance floor.

By the end of the evening, I was ready to go, but we stayed for almost the entire ball this year. The Mr. and I stopped for gelato on our way back to the room (a tradition of ours) to end the evening. I went to sleep after having spent the night laughing with my friends, posing for pictures and dancing with my gorgeous husband until my muscles and feet were sore.

Me and my best friend Sherry.

Let the resolution making (and breaking) begin!

2012-01-05T17:27:00.004-06:00

It has been quite the year and now it is time to make resolutions.

Resolutions can be a good thing. They give us the opportunity to start fresh or even help us take a healthy step toward a better life. But often, we find ourselves slowly breaking away with it. Is it wishful thinking or can we truly keep our resolutions?

I've never been one for resolutions, mainly because I can't seem to stick with them. I've always been the type of person to start something, get bored and move on to something else, leaving the original project to sit around and collect dust. There's been latch hooking, sewing, artwork, exercising... The list goes on.

When the Mr. and I were driving back from Pennsylvania after our two-week Christmas visit, I spent my driving time thinking of resolutions. There's no doubt I've put on a little weight on the last year, but I can't seem to drag my slightly jiggly booty to the gym every day. That, and the fact I feel like I have no time left in my day if I go after work.

For that resolution? Outlook not so good.

Then there's eating healthy. I don't eat terribly, but I do enjoy the occasional McDonald's chicken nugget meal or a sweet something in the afternoon. I doubt I could completely give up on those things for good. I take in plenty of fruits and veggies, as well as balancing carbs and proteins, so I believe that will have to do for now.

On that note, I cannot predict now.

I could try to do something new. Take a class at the Arts and Crafts center, take up a new hobby. But with my past experiences?

Don't count on it.

No, for this year, I'm considering two options. Two options that I think will make me a better person and keep me sane (which I believe can contribute to overall health, which kind of encompasses my first two impossible resolutions. Yes, I may be stretching it a little.).

1. Be more positive

2. Continue blogging.

We all can admit we have moments where we feel like there is no bright side to a situation. We wallow in our self-pity and anger and forget to look for the silver lining.

The military life brings a lot of suck into our lives. We have to say goodbye to friends who are moving, kiss our spouses before sending them off to war, deal with the hassle of on-post agencies, pack and unpack our lives when we PCS and a whole list of other things. It's easy to look at our situation and say, "this sucks."

I've decided I need to focus on embracing "the suck." I'm one of the greatest offenders of wallowing in anger and self-pity. I have a very short fuse and a problem biting my tongue. As negative things build up, I tend to let it get worse. With the Mr. moving from platoon leader to executive officer and working on his Master's degree, I will need to take a bit of a back seat and not be his focus all the time (and sometimes I can be a little needy). This will be my test for resolution making. I'll need to focus on staying positive and working on embracing the suck to keep things solid between us.

And for my second resolution — blogging. It's obvious I've not been keeping up with things as I should and it's time to change all that. I have a big mouth and a lot to say (if you haven't noticed) so I will express all those pent up opinions here. When I first started blogging back in 2010, I had a whole lot more to say because I focused on writing. With working as a journalist now, I've veered off the path and viewed it as work, not a hobby. So stay tuned and you'll be seeing a lot more of me!

So there are my resolutions. I will be doing my best to uphold them. Maybe this will be the year I don't make and break them - just make them. And succeed.

What are YOUR resolutions this year?

On a completely unrelated note, I get to play princess for a night with the cavalry ball tomorrow night! Of course, pictures will be added. I love everything about them and look forward to the evening. And, since everyone always asks, here is a picture of the dress:

What do you think?

There are those who just don't understand...

2011-12-13T21:34:00.002-06:00

I read a story on CNN today that was incredibly heartwarming. The story was about two couples that met through similar circumstances. The soldiers were deployed to Iraq together. The wife of one soldier was pregnant with her first child and the other wife had recently suffered a miscarriage. The story detailed the struggles of a military marriage and how both sides cope with missing out on certain life landmarks. It pulled on the heartstrings and made me tear up a bit at the end.

When I read stories that are interesting or that I enjoy, I often scroll to the bottom and read the comments. On this particular story, I wasn’t prepared for what I read.

The people who commented were bashing military servicemembers for “leaving their children behind” when the child needs them. They also discussed how our servicemembers are fighting an unjust war and “killing civilians.”

Now, I don’t need to go into whether or not some of those statements were true — we’ve all read stories and reports of the sort. It’s war and bad things happen. It’s expected. I will never say it’s right, but it happens.

What I don’t understand is how people can treat servicemembers the way they do. I’ve heard many people say they don’t want this war to have the outcome of Vietnam, where the troops return and aren’t welcomed home. Unfortunately, the more I read about the citizen response to the war, the less optimistic I am.

First of all, no one knows what it’s like to serve as a servicemember or support that servicemember like those who do it — the servicemembers and their spouses. Only we truly understand the hardships, blessings and opportunities. But for people to comment as if they truly understand it? Well, I have a problem with that.

Second, many of those presently serving were enlisted prior to 9/11 and many others chose to serve after watching the catastrophic events of 9/11. They aren’t enlisting to “shoot people,” as one commenter put it and not all of them do it for the benefits.

Third, our servicemembers don’t have a choice of whether or not to go to war. Politicans and others within the government make the decision for them. Every person in our military knows war is always a possibility, but they never know if they will have to fight it. If people disagree with these two wars, they need to take it up with their representatives and senators, not blame those who are fighting.

Also, they don’t choose to leave their families. They’re told to. Being a military spouse means supporting your servicemember through their mission. We know deployments are always an option and we support our servicemember when they’re called to leave. Sure, they may miss out on time with their child, but that doesn’t mean all children who grow up without one of their parents will turn into a delinquent. And to assume so is highly ignorant.

More than anything, those fighting this war need support. We’ve all heard of the issues some returning servicemembers have experienced when seeking medical care for post-traumatic stress disorder, traumatic brain injury and other problems associated with fighting a war. Instead of the citizenry turning their backs on our returning servicemembers, they should be trying to help them.

History repeats itself and if we haven’t learned anything from Vietnam, we will be learning it very soon if things don’t change. Instead of “knocking” something you know nothing about, talk to those who have experience. Learn about their life. Find out what their hardships really are. Don’t judge someone for doing a job that you yourself couldn’t do. If you choose to disagree with the war, that’s your choice., but don’t fault those for choosing to serve so others don’t have to sacrifice time away from family, injury or even death.

The return to the daily grind

2011-12-05T18:06:00.003-06:00

The Mr. has officially been home for about a month and a half now. We're both back at work after spending a nice long bit of time off work and back in PA.

We spent two amazing weeks experiencing the winters back home. The Mr.'s dad bought a house and fixed it up for us to stay at. It's just a little place (we called it our "bungalow") but perfect for the two of us. We're in the middle of nowhere, but only about 10 minutes from town. I was cut off from the internet and I couldn't have been happier. It was a great chance for the Mr. and me to get reacquainted.

We spent Thanksgiving with his parents and then a few days with mine. I ate too much, enjoyed delicious food and have been paying for it with a few extra pounds!

I've been enjoying getting adjusted to work, but we'll be leaving again soon for Christmas. I'm trying to volunteer to get extra stories each week so I can do my share.

With it now being December, I got tons of decorating done and love walking in my house to the lights and smells of Christmas. I bought a Scentsy a few months ago and got to switch to my winter scents. Peppermint, cinnamon and other spices. Wonderful!

What is your favorite part about Christmas?

The homecoming and honeymoon period

2011-11-06T19:04:00.007-06:00

Yep, we began, and are still continuing, the honeymoon phase since the deployment has ended.

Just to give an example, we cooked dinner tonight. Together. Both doing our own thing, but working together and creating a delicious meal (if I do say so myself). We had classical music on in the background and sat at the table like adults.

I have to admit, I spent more time eating on the living room couch while the Mr. was away than I did eating at the table. I don't like sitting at a table alone like that.

It's been a great last couple weeks.

Though I have to say, waiting for the Mr. to get in to the welcome home ceremony felt as long as the whole deployment! I don't get why the Army feels like family members need to wait any longer when they're soldier is standing right in front of them. Seriously, I saw the Mr. (he was three rows back) and then had to wait for the National Anthem, the Army Song and the speaker to do their thing. Fortunately, the speaker only spoke for about three minutes and then released the men.

That's where the cluster began.

Like I said, I could see the Mr. a few rows back, but getting to him was the hard part. Everyone is hugging their soldier or running to find them, so I didn't want to walk in between people. Instead, I decide to run get up on the bleachers and wave my arms for the Mr. to see me (I was in a salmon pink shirt and he knew what I was wearing). In my 3 inch heels. Luckily I didn't twist my ankle!

I'm waving my arms like a lunatic and yelling his name, thinking he will hear me (yeah, like that was going to happen). So I ran back down the bleachers to him.

It felt so good running into his arms, kissing him for the first time in 8 months and knowing he was finally home safe. I'll admit, I started crying.

Of course the last two weeks have been an adjustment — I have twice the laundry, a second person to clean up after and more food to cook. The Mr. is certainly doing his share of the work though. Today he helped clean up a lot of his own things, saving me from doing it. Plus his extra efforts with cooking also helped.

He washed the dishes that didn't fit in the dishwasher. And I didn't ask him too. It's so great having his help like that.

I told him tonight that the house feels so complete when he's here. I know it sounds corny, but it's true. There is nothing like seeing him or talking to him in the next room. I don't think this will ever get old to me.

Yep, I decorated our door. The Mr. wanted something more private than a big banner, but I still wanted a little welcome home sign, so I fixed up our door. Our goodbye was private, so we had our reunion private.

Dear deployment...

2011-10-27T15:24:00.002-05:00

I win.

Day 361: The time has come, the Walrus said...

2011-10-25T19:09:00.003-05:00

Well, I finally have found some time to sit down and clear my mind a bit in preparation for an exciting blog entry.

I had an incredible privilege today to cover the homecoming of one of the most recent flights of the Brigade. Unlike most civilians, I had the chance of going to the airport and watching the soldiers deplane with grins on their faces, excited to see their families. I talked to them, completed some interviews and took tons of photographs.

It made me miss the Mr.

BUT...

This is my last night alone.

Yep, you saw it correctly.

My.

Last.

Night.

Alone.

The Mr. is coming home. FINALLY!

See, the thing no one ever tells you, is the last few weeks of a deployment, you lose your frickin' mind.

I have been a maniac over the last week and a half. I've been busy preparing the house, going food shopping for his favorites and stocking up on the items he uses. I've been checking and double checking because I don't want to forget a thing! I'm sure I've been on edge sometimes and completely erratic and hyper at others.

I've been forcing myself to not get too excited. I know it's official that he's coming home, but I also know I have time that I have to get through yet.

I can't believe a year has gone by. At times it felt long and at other times it flew. I've waited so long to see the Mr.'s smiling face, feel his touch and have his warmth in bed with me each night.

The homecoming brings feelings of apprehension and anxiety. As many of you know, I've only lived with the Mr. for a total of 6 months in the 2 years and 7 months we've been married. We've never been able to live together without him having to leave for training or a deployment. We've always been waiting for something, but this time, we don't have to wait. We will be able to have our first year together that we've never had.

I never would have made it without my incredible girlfriends here. They offered me time to close off my mind to everything but the things going on during our time together. They were my shoulder when times were tough and my strong arms to lift me up. They were there to laugh over a couple drinks, hold hands during times of worry and fear and a warm embrace whenever I felt down. I will never be able to explain the amazing bond military spouses have. Somehow, without even knowing each other for long, we open ourselves up to a relationship that can never be broken. Maybe that's what it's like for our service members and their "brotherhood."

There were days where I didn't want to get out of bed and close myself off to the world. I have no problem admitting to that. But there were other times where they only way they could be perfect was to have my husband home.

No matter what, I've finally made it. I've appreciated all the kind words you all had to share during the tough times. I came to all of you as my outlet (even if I wasn't good at updating things) and don't plan on going away just yet. I'm sure there will be difficult times ahead, getting used to living with the man I've hardly ever lived with.

But I'm looking forward to the next segment of my journey.

Day 324: Reflecting on the journey

2011-09-18T13:58:00.003-05:00

What a week it has been! I'm sorry I've fallen off a bit. Things have been moving right along with work and other events this week, so I finally have time to freely write.

When I typed the title, I couldn't believe the numbers. I have finally hit day 324. I remember writing "Day 8" when I was extremely depressed, doing nothing but worrying and not taking care of myself.

For those of you preparing for your loved one to deploy for the first time or the fifth time, don't forget that you must take care of yourself, despite all the worrying. I remember sitting at home, watching TV, eating unhealthy foods, skipping workouts and just being lazy. I would stay up until 4 a.m. and sleep until 10 a.m. I was never sleeping soundly and couldn't eat much.

Since then, I've really gotten back to what is normal: Eating regularly, exercising, getting to bed at a normal time. I swear that going back to work was exactly what I needed. Not a day goes by that I'm not grateful. Work provided such a distraction from everything else, helping keep my mind active. And the extra cash never hurts!

As much as I may complain to my friends about my job, I love it. I have never had a better job. There is nothing more satisfying than writing for military families. Being able to share my experiences, as new as they may be, feels so good. If I can connect with one spouse, I feel that's a success.

Now that the deployment is winding down, I'm proud of how far I've come. While deployments can ruin some marriages, I feel like my own has gotten stronger. I've learned to communicate much better with the Mr., since much of the communication is through email. The Mr. is kept busy almost every day, so there isn't much time for phone calls or Skype. The last time we did a video chat was in May for my birthday. I'll be so happy when we can finally talk face to face!

How did YOU grow during a deployment?

Day 318: When military spouses rally together

2011-09-12T17:01:00.003-05:00

It took me some time to decide if I would blog about this, but I've decided to since I believe this is something that make military spouses incredible.

One of my favorite Army wives, Kat, who blogs on "The Unlikely Wife," faced the second worst thing that can happen to a military spouse -- Two uniformed men arrived at her house to tell her the love of her life was seriously injured.

Now, I'd like to start off by saying I've never met this amazing, strong woman in person. We met through a military spouse support site over a year ago and have been communicating since. We've helped each other say goodbye to our husbands and cheered each other up through the deployment.

I saw Kat post on Facebook that her husband was injured. I immediately responded asking her what happened, when she sent me a text explaining the situation. I offered as many words of support I could muster, but still they never seemed like enough.

Her husband lost both of his legs, according to her blog. This is a hard time for her, so be sure to show her a little love.

I've been following her Facebook page extensively, looking to hear how she is doing and how her husband is doing. There has been such a huge outpouring of love, both on Facebook and on her blog.

What is it about military spouses that makes them come together in amazing ways, even when they haven't known each other long? It's very hard to find that in the civilian community. Some barely know each other or have never met and are doing everything they can to support each other. It's amazing that we can drop what we're doing and ask, "are you okay?" We can offer those words of support the other person needs, even if they don't seem strong enough. Even if they aren't the "right words."

But really, what are the "right words?" How can we help someone's grief or distress? Not that I'm any expert, but helping someone through a difficult time doesn't have to involve words, other than "I am here for you." Simply putting yourself out there to assist if needed can often be the calming element to a person's chaos.

After hearing her dreaded news, I was in shock. She sent me the text at work and I walked outside, crying. I couldn't imagine the pain she was feeling. I couldn't imagine being in her position, trying to figure out a plan of action over something that can completely change both their lives. I wanted to hop on a plane and get to her, wherever she was, just to be a shoulder to cry on. Even if I couldn't do anything to help her. All I could think about was how she was feeling. I kept putting myself in her place, as calm as she seemed, asking, "what would I do in this situation?" I hoped I could muster up some words of advice, even with no experience in this.

I don't know what hit me so hard about it, but it might be the increased worry I felt about the Mr. A few people tried to get my mind off Kat's pain by saying, "Thank God it wasn't your husband."

Wow.

You know, that doesn't take care of the fact that it was someone's husband. Maybe I didn't have to hear the frightful news of my husband's injury, but she did. And my heart breaks for her and any other spouse who has gone through this.

The same goes for whenever I hear about another service member's death. My heart breaks for their family. Somewhere, a mother and father lost their child, a sibling lost another sibling, and on the list goes. Of course I'm grateful it wasn't my husband, but that doesn't mean it's a better situation because it happened to someone else. It still upsets me.

Nothing can ever prepare us to hear that kind of news, or the worst news. We're never prepared for it and never can be. All we can do is pray and hope for the best.

So today, hug your kids and kiss your men. If your loved one isn't with you, send them a message telling them you love them. Sometimes, that's the most important thing.

Day 308: Friday Fill-in

2011-09-02T10:24:00.002-05:00

Yay for a 4-day weekend! I'm not doing anything special, but I'm looking forward to working only four days next week. With a special edition paper memorializing Sept. 11, it will be a quick, short week with a great paper.

With it being Friday, it's time for another round of MilSpouse Friday Fill-ins! If you haven't joined in on your blog, visit Wife of A Sailor's page to join in! Feel free to answer the questions in the comments section below.

This weeks questions are:

My plans for this weekend include meeting friends for dinner tonight, shopping tomorrow, meeting with friends for coffee on Monday and helping another friend with her son's birthday tomorrow, but what I’d really like to do is lock myself in the house for movies and time alone.
I consider the Labor Day holiday a great excuse to be off work.
My favorite meal for cookouts is sausage sandwiches, french fries and a nice salad, but my parents wouldn’t agree. (They like to have a nice, BIG feast)
So far, my favorite part of summer has been my vacation to North Carolina for a trip with one of my best friends and getting more than halfway through the deployment.
When it comes to deployments, my philosophy is don't stop your life. Use the time apart to grow yourself. Learn or try something new with a friend of your kids. Explore new places with a friend so you can have a romantic getaway with your man. Don't lock yourself in your house and stay in your pajamas. Get close with some ladies who are going through the same thing. When you're upset, talk about it. It's okay to cry, but don't let yourself wallow in sadness and grief. Do things that make you happy and keep yourself healthy! I could go on and on about this topic, because I made too many of those mistakes.

What is YOUR deployment philosophy?

Day 306: Writer Wednesday

2011-08-31T17:22:00.004-05:00

Why We Make Mistakes - Joseph T. Hallinan

I loved this book so much, that I actually did a book review on it for the post newspaper. Even if you don't enjoy reading non-fiction, this is an incredible book. The author, an award winning investigative journalist, displays his knowledge of research skills with vasts amount of evidence to back up his claims.

If you're looking to win a bet in a bar, Hallinan provides a fool-proof way. Ask the person you're speaking with, if Reno, Nevada is north or south of San Diego, California. Then ask them if Reno is east or west of San Diego.

Do you know the answer?

Reno is north of San Diego -- most people get that part of the bet correct. Here is how most people answer the second part of the question:

1. Reno is in Nevada
2. Nevada is east of California
3. Reno is east of San Diego

If you answer the question that way, you're wrong. But don't think you're stupid. Majority of Americans will answer that question the exact same way. Here's why.

Our minds enjoy, despite our own objections, having things in a neat order. For example, we will look at a map and straighten roads, borders, rivers, etc to make the picture as simple as possible. California is an "L" shaped state. It runs straight up-and-down until you get toward the southern end of the state, where is veers to the east. Nevada follows that border. In our minds, however, we trick ourselves. We straighten the state of California, so it appears as a vertical line, neglecting the "L" shape. Pretty interesting, huh?

The book covers a wide variety of topics, from "looking without seeing," "wearing rose colored glasses" and why we "all think we're above average."

Oh, I have to touch on the thinking we're all above average. The United States Army did a study on that with infantrymen going through basic training at Fort Benning, Georgia. Before the men went to qualify with their M-16 rifles, they were asked to rate how well they would shoot. More than 75% believed they would shoot very well and that they were "a good shot."

The targets disagreed.

Many of them we're only average or below average. One out of every four of the men who claimed to have good shots, shot so poorly, they didn't even qualify.

We tend to overestimate how good we are at something, but there isn't a clear reason why. Maybe we want to show off. Maybe we want to think "positively."

I just find it interesting.

What are YOU reading?

Day 305: The rumor mill

2011-08-30T17:54:00.003-05:00

As you all know, I work for the post newspaper, which is also attached to the Public Affairs Office at our post. There was a recent "incident," combined with some other issues that created a HUGE batch of rumors.

The event went from being the true incident that occurred, to a man who killed his wife and was loose somewhere on post. The latter isn't true.

The PAO has a Facebook page, which is used to post updates for events on post, whether good or bad. In order to quell the rumors, the PAO released a statement on the incident. More than 50 people commented on the Facebook post. A few people were accepting and glad to finally know what occurred.

However, there was a large group that wasn't so kind.

It went from people "calling bullshit" to people saying, "way to lie to prevent public panic. It's what the media does afterall." I won't get into all the comments littered with grammatical and spelling errors -- that's just pointless. I'm amazed, however, that so many people believe what they hear from unreliable sources and not what their told by dependable people.

Sure, people can choose to disagree or feel like they aren't receiving the whole story, but to blame someone for releasing the information they're told? It doesn't seem right.

I'm amazed at the audacity of people to call bullshit or to claim they're being lied to, especially when they have no facts -- they only know what they hear. It's not like any of them know that some guy killed his wife (which didn't happen). They believe it because they get the information from others, like their friends, even if the information is wrong.

I guess I had too much faith in some military spouses. I thought some of us were mature enough to disagree in a constructive manner, not attack "the messenger," so to speak. Obviously I don't believe every single milspouse out there acts this way. I'm simply surprised by the amount of them that do.

Now, I'm not defending the PAO because I work for it, but rather because I agree with what they did. They simply passed along the information they received -- it's what the media do. They take the facts they receive from another organization and format it to pass it on to the public.

I was also amazed at the amount of women who posted that their husbands were deployed. To paraphrase at least 20 responses: "I was so scared because I have young children and my husband is deployed."

Really? You were scared about the rumor you heard because you have two children, and then you post that information on a PUBLIC page? People unaffiliated with our post could visit that page and find the pictures of these women. They could find out who they are, meaning their exact name. Not all their Facebook pages are private, so it isn't as hard to determine where someone lives.

Now, I don't know if some of those wives wrote about their husbands being deployed to get attention, to make it seem like the situation is worse for them, or whatever, but there was absolutely no reason to post that kind of information. It's stupid. Plain and simple.

So ladies, let's stop being so concerned with rumors and just deal with getting the facts. Let's be mindful of what we say and how we say it. Let's talk to people like human beings, even if it's through a computer.

And for the love of God, STOP detailing your husband's deployment when your name and location are public.

No one appreciates that.

What are your experiences with rumor on post/base?

Day 302: The frustration of return dates

2011-08-27T14:29:00.002-05:00

No, the guys are not even close enough to know specific dates, but I wanted to make a blog entry on the issue. It seems that many spouses get antsy and want to know the dates they can expect their soldier home, but all spouses need to remember it will be a while to learn specific dates.

I understand the frustration. We wait so long for our husbands to return that we start pressuring to know a date. We want to be able to make plans for vacation, days off work and be sure we have everything in order before the guys arrive. What is unnecessary is the complaining.

I've seen a variety of posts on Facebook from wives within the Mr.'s squadron expecting to know a date more than two months out. Rumors were spreading a few months ago that the guys would get home early and many women are expecting that to be true. It's not.

Now, I get that many of these wives may be new to the whole deployment process -- I am too. However, I've been around the Army long enough to know there is never a date set in stone, whether it's a deployment, return from a training exercise or a PCS date.

Let's face it -- this is what happens.

How can we ever expect to know a specific date?

The rumor mill is always running. I think any wife of a deployed service member knows this. One person hears "information" from the husband and believe it's true, especially since their husband is the one sharing the information. But that information travels through a bunch of people that may only hear snippets of conversation; not the whole thing.

We need to be conscious of that. Dates change and there is no arguing with it. There can be delays in flights, weather problems, increased activity and more that can set back a return.

There's also the problem of wives sharing dates they've heard. On Facebook, no less.

I'm amazed at how few wives understand OPSEC. It's one of the major parts of the Army wife life (or any other branch service for that matter). We're briefed on it prior to deployment and reminded of it for the duration of the deployment.

We had an issue with return dates when the Mr.'s squadron was out for training in Wyoming. A spouse leaked the date her husband told her and it started to spread. Quite a few wives found out about it. The result? A week-long delay before their return to post. All because someone leaked the date.

Now, the training itself was only a few weeks, but it's the principle that frustrates me. I swear, if someone leaked a date causing the Mr. to have a delay? I'd. Be. Pissed. I mean, I'd be smack-a-bitch pissed. To me, there is no excuse. How hard is it to keep a date or time to yourself? Why do you need to tell everyone you know when your husband is getting home? I don't know if it's a bragging thing, as in, my-husband-is-coming-home-early-and-yours-is-still-gone or if it's just because they are so excited they can't contain it.

But when it comes to the safety of 20 soldiers, it's important to keep your mouth shut.

I have no idea when Frank comes home. Obviously there is always an estimated date of return, but I never stick to it. Hell, I added a month to save disappointment. If he comes home earlier, I'll be thrilled.

I'd just rather wait for them to make it safely home and then share with everyone how happy I am he is by my side -- not on the other side of the world working his way home.

Have YOU ever had experiences of spouses not following OPSEC? Did you tell them they were making a mistake or did you ignore it?

Day 301: Friday Fill-in

2011-08-26T19:55:00.002-05:00

Whew! It has been a long week and I'm so ready to dive into the weekend!

I became the proud new owner of a MacBook Pro and I'm seriously in love. I've been doing my best to refrain from drooling all over the keyboard. It's so sleek and shiny and NEW! I don't think I'll be regretting my decision anytime soon. I guess I really need to thank the Mr. Let's face it -- My measly wage at the newspaper certainly didn't pay for this. Just sayin'.

Besides all the cheers for it being Friday, it also means it's time for the Friday Fill-in. If you have a blog and haven't joined in yet, head over to Wife of A Sailor's page to get the questions. They're posted on Thursdays so you can get a head start! Don't forget to link up on her page with your answers. If you don't have a blog, you can still participate. Just fill your answers in the comments section below!

Here are this week's questions:

1. The first thing I think of when I get up in the morning is here comes another day. Each one down is another closer to the Mr. being home.

2. Lately, I’ve been craving ice cream because it has been ages since I last had some. Can't wait to enjoy a bowl with the Mr in a couple short months!

3. Whenever anyone says the word park, it reminds me of my childhood because I grew up across the street from a park growing up. My parents used to take my brother and I there all the time. I learned how to ride my bike there. We had so many good times, but once we moved, we never found another park nice enough.

4. The happiest word I know is laughter, but I guarantee there are a lot of people that get annoyed at how often I laugh. I can't help it -- I like to laugh and enjoy making other people smile.

5. My spouse may hate it, but I absolutely love having conversations with the Mr. I've always said he is the smartest person I know.

What about YOU?

Day 300: Ho-ly. Week.

2011-08-25T18:37:00.002-05:00

Oh. My. Goodness.

This has been an insane week. I'm SO ready for the weekend!

It didn't start off well. My computer happened to crash on me sometime Sunday night. I didn't find this out until Monday evening after work. I couldn't do a thing on it. Granted, my computer is 5 years old, which for a laptop, is old. It's been reaching its extinction for the last year.

I figured out how to get it semi-working and it only needs to hold me over until tomorrow night. Yes, I'm officially getting a new computer! It will make me enjoy writing a bit more and will also run a lot better (gasp).

My week went incredibly fast at first, then would slow for a bit. Then speed back up. I was supposed to have an assignment that would take me out of the office for majority of the day in 105 degree weather today. Turns out people weren't prepared, so I can avoid the heat wave until Tuesday.

I'll be covering a unit's FTX and the PAO is getting me all prepped up for the heat. Because I'll be outside on assignment, I'll be in jeans and sneakers (fortunately I can at least wear a T-shirt!). The PAO will be giving me a "cooling vest" that works for about 4 hours that I wear under my shirt. That's going to be so helpful! Plus, I'll have a water system so I don't pass out.

With it being Thursday, here are the things I'm celebrating this week for Champagne Thursday:

1. The weekend! Which means two days off work.

2. Labor day is only a week away and that will be a three-day weekend!

3. A friend from work is hosting a bowling party tomorrow night. Should be a lot of fun with some great people.

4. I get my new laptop tomorrow night!

5. We have officially reached day 300 of the deployment. Once again. The deployment can suck it

What are YOU celebrating this week?

Day 294: A bit of catching up and Friday Fill-in

2011-08-19T18:52:00.004-05:00

Whew!

I don't know where the last couple weeks have gone. Seriously, I've been busy or had plans every single day over the last two weeks.

Tonight, I decided to say "no" for once and settled for an evening at home, without worrying about work the next day.

I've been writing away with a bunch of stories and my workload has finally settled. This week I won't have as much stress as I've had and look forward to curling up with a book over the weekend!

I opened my little, "doughnut of misery," to see how the days are going and we've almost reached day 300. By next week, we'll have moved beyond it.

I've reached the point where I'm getting antsy for the Mr. to come home. For those of you who don't know or have only recently followed my blog, the Mr. and I have not had a consecutive year together since we met in 2007. The military has taken him away multiple times for many weeks, separating us for not just one year, but two, with only six months in between.

I've started to think about how things will be when he's home, despite how long that takes. We already have multiple trips in the works, including visiting friends of his that were stationed only six hours away. We have plans for trips "home," creating a "man cave" for him, plus activities we'd like to start with together.

I've always said the first two weeks our military men are gone and the last two weeks before they come home are the hardest. The first two weeks are acclimating to being alone and the final two weeks are filled with anxiety for the homecoming and restarting your lives together. While we aren't even close to the two week mark (very far away, in fact), I'm so ready for it to be here!

I like to think this deployment has helped me grow. While I started off on the wrong track (basically locking myself in the house and becoming very anti-social), staying up until 4 a.m. every day, not working out and only sitting around, I've learned to deal with it. I found my first "adult" job at the newspaper and went through the process on my own -- without the Mr. and without my family.

I've survived this long and know I'll make it the last little bit!

When have YOU gotten antsy for deployments to end?

I'm also leaving off with the Friday Fill-in. You didn't think I'd forget, did you? Feel free to join in with the comments section below or head over to Wife of A Sailor's page and post your link!

This week's questions are:

1. My spouse and I rarely agree on what we purchase, but always agree on how much we can spend.

2. If I could use one word to sum up the way I feel right now, it would be impatience. I want my hubby home!

3. One of the things my spouse does that grosses me out is really nothing. Either he isn't very gross or I just don't notice.

4. My readers may think I’m crazy for doing this, but I really love to clean. I'm a bit obsessive compulsive about the neatness of my house.

5. Frankly, my dear, I don’t care how you live your life or your ideals, just don't expect mine to be the same.

What about you?

Day 281: Why we need to keep the troops at the forefront of our minds

2011-08-06T15:34:00.003-05:00

I planned to do this post weeks ago, but felt that I was bothered over something that isn't a big deal. After the news of today, I feel it's necessary.

When I was on Facebook a few weeks ago, I saw that someone was hosting an event to wear yellow in remembrance of Caylee Anthony, the 2-year-old that was killed in 2008 that many believed was by her own mother. So much of the United States population followed the case and watched it unfold on national television. Tourists traveled to Orlando, racing other hopefuls to get inside the courtroom to witness the proceedings.

Many sat in front of the television from the time the court proceedings began, until it was adjourned for the day. Others mouths were gaping when the not guilty verdict was delivered and were maddened by the results. Because of that anger, someone wanted to commemorate the deceased child's birthday by wearing yellow in remembrance. I don't even remember the great number of people who responded that they would, in fact, wear yellow.

I'd like to preface my next point by saying there isn't anything wrong with that. I myself was glued to the television, wondering what evidence would be brought forth. I wasn't in the group of maddened individuals, as I felt our justice system worked.

How is it so easy for majority of the population to feel sorrow for this young girl, but yet neglect the mass amount of service member deaths that have occurred in the last 10 years? The service members that are risking everything to fight for a country they believe in?

"Wear red on Fridays" has been on-going since the start of the war. Asking for the United States populace to wear red each Friday until all the service members come home. How many outside of military spouses actually do that?

Today, 30 United States service members and 8 Afghan National Army soldiers were killed when a Chinook was shot down by Taliban insurgents in Wardak Province, Afghanistan. I'm sure many of you saw the news.

I sent up a prayer thanking God that the Mr. was safe, but felt immediate guilt for not thinking of the service members who were lost. The number of service member deaths for just this week is appalling. Tears have come to my eyes for the families of those serving. Somewhere, a wife lost her husband, a mother lost her son, a sister lost her brother, and on the list goes. Somewhere today, multiple families are getting the knock on their door, telling them their loved one will never come home.

This breaks my heart.

I, like many, read the news story today. This is the single most violent incident since the beginning of the war. A friend of mine, the Unlikely Wife, posted on Facebook that, "while we were sleeping, 30 warriors lost their lives." While we woke up and went about our day, 30 families were preparing to bear the most unbearable burden.

The point of this entire post is that it's okay to get caught up in the latest "trend." But we can never forget our troops, who are putting their lives on the line every day. They can't go about their day without worrying. Not only do they worry about what is happening in-country, they're worrying about their families at home.

So hug your kids and kiss your men. If your loved one is deployed, send them a note that you are thinking of them, missing them and loving them, no matter what they're doing at this moment. And never forget to go to bed without praying for their safe return and strength for the families of those who will never come home.

Day 274: Friday Fill-in

2011-07-30T19:31:00.002-05:00

Sorry about the Fill-in being one day late. If you haven't joined in yet, head on over to Wife of A Sailor's blog to get started! Feel free to answer in the comment section below.

This week’s questions are:

1. Facebook or Twitter?

Facebook. I don't use Twitter at all. I don't really understand it.

2. Hard Tacos or Soft Tacos?

I like hard tacos so I can mash them up to make a taco salad.

3. Gardening or crafting?

Gardening. I'm not good at it, but I like being outside and digging in the dirt. Plus it's so nice to be outside and seeing what I've done!

4. Fruit or vegetables?

I tend to eat more veggies than fruit. I don't like peeling fruit. Vegetables just require you to pick them up and eat them.

5. Motorcycle or bicycle?

I would love a motorcycle. The Mr.'s dad and my dad both have or had motorcycles. I want to get my license and ride one, but we need to wait until we get to a nicer area. The roads here are not good for riding.

So what about you?

Day 272: Dear deployment...

2011-07-28T21:17:00.002-05:00

Dear deployment,

I just have to say one thing...

Suck it.

Day 257: Writer Wednesday

2011-07-13T19:01:00.003-05:00

Fair Game -- Valerie Plame Wilson

I was totally into this book. If you're unfamiliar with the story of Valerie Plame, she was a CIA covert officer specializing in counter proliferation with a focus on Weapons of Mass Destruction. She and her team were the first group searching for information on nuclear, chemical and biological weapons in Iraq.

Her husband, Joe Wilson, was selected by the CIA to visit Niger and investigate a claim that Niger was selling yellowcake uranium to Iraq. On his journey, he discovered there was no link. The information was reported to the Bush administration. During President Bush's "State of the Union" address, he inserted "16 words" claiming that the British government discovered that Niger was indeed selling yelllowcake uranium to Iraq. This was later found out to be an untrue statement.

Because Joe Wilson was pulled into the discussion, he wrote an op-ed for the New York Times -- "What I did not find in Niger." In the piece, Wilson explained that he didn't find anything there -- the Bush administration added that information. Later, Plame's name was leaked to the newspapers and at first it was unclear of the leak.

After dealing with the ordeal of her exposure, Plame chose to write a book about it. It was a way of helping her control her emotions. Because of working with the CIA, she had to submit her manuscript to the Publishing Review Board for examination. The PRB later returned her manuscript with thick black lines blocking out certain words, and sometimes pages. The publisher, Simon and Schuster, decided to print the book with the omission marks included.

Plame is an incredibly descriptive writer. At times, I felt like I was feeling the fear, worry and anxiety she was. There is a lot of CIA jargon, but Plame does her best to explain it fully to not live your head spinning. I had trouble putting it down because I wanted to know what happened next!

What are you reading?

Day 256: Is tomorrow Wednesday already?!

2011-07-12T20:15:00.002-05:00

According to my Doughnut of Misery, we're 70% done with this deployment.

Wow.

It's so hard to believe that we've jumped this far ahead, after remembering what only 10% completed looked like.

If you aren't familiar with the Doughnut of Misery, it's a chart that lists how long your hubby's been gone, how long until he comes home (broken down into hours, minutes and seconds) and even provides a chart. Uncompleted time is shown red and completed is green. It finally looks mostly green. AWESOME!

I feel like my weekend just started and it's almost hump day already! Seriously, I have no idea where the time is going. I feel like I spend all day in a fog because it's suddenly over. I don't know how I'm even driving home. You know that driver's amnesia or highway amnesia (whatever it's called)? When you're driving somewhere and arrive at your destination, but don't have any clue how you got there because you don't remember it? That's how my whole day goes. I get my work done, but I never understand how because it's like I'm not paying attention.

Whew, that was a long explanation.

We had an FRG meeting tonight and were discussing some redeployment things and the ball to celebrate the units homecoming. That really shows me how close we're getting. Once I hear the new unit that is replacing the Mr.'s gets in, I'll know we're almost there.

We've already started planning a trip and setting aside money to visit Boston. I haven't been there in ages and the Mr. has never been there. Ever. He's never explored the Northeast. I can't wait to be a part of something that's new for him.

Until then, the waiting game continues.

How do YOU beat the deployment slump?

Day 253: Playing a little catch-up

2011-07-09T20:26:00.002-05:00

I dropped my parents off at the airport yesterday afternoon. My awesome boss gave me the day off after my assignment in the morning. She thought I should spent the last little bit of time with them that I had. They had a few delays, but made it home safely. There were tears and hugs exchanged at the airport before they left. This is about the closest thing my parents get to understanding what I go through with the Mr. I've missed out on a couple days of Friday Fill-ins, but I'll be picking it up now!

From last week:

1. Have you (spouse) ever considered joining the military and what do you think of dual military couples? submitted by Project Army Wife

I considered enlisting right after high school. I guess you could say I wanted to take the time to serve my country. I spoke to a few people about it and the recommended I go to school first. That way, I would get my education right away, choosing not to put it off until later, and could always go through ROTC. I later decided not to, but considered becoming an embedded reporter. After meeting the Mr., I decided it wouldn't be as feasible. I think being a dual military couple would make things difficult, especially when beginning a family. Then again, it must not be that hard if so many are able to make it work.

2. What is your idea of a perfect Sunday afternoon? submitted by A Few of My Favorite Things

The Mr. and I like to sleep in a couple extra hours, have breakfast and coffee and spend the afternoon cuddled together watching movies. We normally cook a nice dinner then, so we would enjoy that to finish the night. Yeah, we probably don't sound that exciting, but it works for us.

3. What do you usually do for the 4th of July holiday? submitted by Anchor’s Away

Ha, we have no pattern because we've only spent one together in four years. Hopefully we can format a tradition as time goes on. We always joke that it's the one holiday we never seem to get together.

4. If they could make an Olympic event JUST for you that you know you’d medal in, what would it be? submitted by Pants are Confusing

Twirling baton. Ha ha, it sounds so nerdy, but I did it for 11 years. I was really good until I quit so I could do colorguard in high school.

5. What have you been doing to get yourself bathing suit ready for the summer? submitted by Not Just an Army Wife

Since I've been working, I haven't been doing too much. I'm normally so tired by the time I get home, that I don't have any energy left to work out. I need to get on that.

And for this week:

1. Does your Significant Other read your blog? Why is this a good or a bad thing? submitted by Mrs. Alana’s Miscellany

I don't know how often the Mr. reads my blog now that he's deployed. Sometimes he mentions what I write, so I assume he reads it on occasion. I don't think it's a good or bad thing -- it's a good way for him to know what I'm doing and how I am when we don't talk for a stretch of time.

2. What is one item in your house that holds the most sentimental value and why? submitted by The Albrecht Squad

We have a picture from out wedding that our photographer printed on a piece of canvas, which is stretched over a frame, so it looks like a painting. It's a great picture of us and a lot of people mention "how in love we look." It's a photograph we'll always be able to look at and remember our wedding and how in love we've always been.

3. When it comes to water fun in the summer do you prefer the beach, the pool, a lake, or the sprinklers? submitted by The Turvo Times

I always have, and always will, prefer the beach. I love the feel of the sand on my toes, building sandcastles and wading in the waves. It's the smell of the ocean that really reminds me of summer and there is no other smell like it. Whether it's a hotel balcony or the deck of a beach house, there is nothing like sitting on it on a summer morning, drinking coffee and having breakfast. It's soothing, yet fun and gives that refresher people look for in trips.

4. What is the one special thing that you do for yourself to get you through the first week of a deployment/separation? submitted by A Creed and a Psalm

I've never really done anything too "special." Mostly I watch movies that I enjoy to help pass the time and take my mind off the initial separation shock. I've spent so much of my marriage alone that the same movies have been watched a LOT in the last two years!

5. What is your biggest guilty pleasure website? submitted by Christine’s Little Blog

Oh geez. I love Dear Blank, Please Blank and Passive Aggressive Notes. If you're ever in need of a good laugh (or ten) those websites are a great start. Sometimes, when it's slow at work, I'll pull them up. But shhh, don't tell anyone!

What about you?

Day 249: First night alone in a week

2011-07-05T21:34:00.002-05:00

Have you ever spent time with your family or friends for an extended amount of time and, when they leave or you leave, you feel so much more alone? I'm experiencing that now.

My parents are still visiting, which has been an incredible time. We've done some exploring, shopping and played a lot of games together (I'm a huge fan of board games). They decided to take a night in New Orleans since they're so close. They can drive there, so it really saves money on a trip since they spent money on a plane ticket to get here. The downside for me, is this is my first night alone in a week.

To some of you, it may sound like I'm whiny. I don't mean to be. We're over 8 months into this deployment and I guess it's starting to get to me. I'm tired of being alone.

I don't remember all the phases of the deployment cycle anymore, but I know I've finally hit my wall. Everyone says it happens at some point. This is the main reason I hoped the Mr.'s R&R would be much later in the deployment, rather than the beginning. We had no such luck.

The Mr. has been incredible and very supportive thus far in our journey. He's done everything to help give me that push to keep moving strong. I've always said I'm so blessed to have a husband like him. But not having a hustle and bustle like I've had for the last week feels weird right now. I guess I'm just getting tired of waiting. Part of the problem could be that I wasn't working much for the last week.

Now that I'm back at work, I think that will help consume my time. I have enough to keep my mind off things that I don't realize how quickly the day goes.

So what do you do when you reach the deployment slump?

Day 240: Weekend Wrap-up

2011-06-26T14:01:00.002-05:00

All I can say is I was so ready for the weekend!

Not that I'm doing anything exciting or new, but I needed the chance to relax and prep myself for this week. On Friday I lost my phone. I thought I had it when I was leaving for work, but never grabbed it. So I went all day without it. I hadn't heard from the Mr. all week, so I really didn't want to miss his calls! I spent an hour once I got home trying to find it. That's a bad thing about deployments. Since the Mr. isn't here, I don't have his phone to help me find my own. You know, calling it and following the ring until you find it. That left me with just looking without any sound to help guide me. Eventually I find it and had about 4 missed calls, 2 voicemails and 7 text messages. See? THAT'S why I need my phone. Fortunately none of them were work calls. At least I got a message from the Mr. telling me he was back from his mission.

I went out to dinner Friday night at one of the best Mexican places in the area and enjoyed a delicious meal! The best thing about Mexican food is it's so inexpensive, but you get get a lot and you stay full. I came back, opened a nice bottle of wine and settled in for the evening.

Have you ever seen the movie, "Red?" I heard some good things about it, so I added it to my Netflix cue. I miss watching "Mad Men" now that I'm all caught up, so now I'm on to actual movies. "Red" had a lot of action, humor and was overall, a good movie. Bruce Willis plays a retired CIA agent and is being tracked down by present CIA agents due to activities her participated in during his career. It has a lot of twists and turns, so I recommend it!

I also re-started the HBO series, "John Adams." It's based on the biography by David McCullough, detailing the journey to American Independence and the latter part of Adams' life. If you enjoy those kinds of movies, you should watch this one. it's incredibly accurate. I've lost count of how many times I've watched it!

Yesterday I cleaned a bit in preparation for my parents' visit, ran a few errands and had a couple friends over for dinner. I made a big pot of pasta and made my sauce. I'll never make it as good as the Mr., but I sure make a valiant effort! I look forward to him coming back and cooking up a good meal.

The deployment process is still moving along smoothly. I've gotten myself so busy with things that I don't have too much time to think about the Mr. being gone. We got a chance to talk this morning and we can't believe how close we're getting to redeployment. It's still a decent way off, but it's amazing to think we have 240 days of it complete. I still remember when the Mr. first left and how long the first four months took. Now, I can't believe how little we have left. Granted, it's a lot of time yet, but if it days continue moving as quickly as they have been, it won't be much longer. I'm so thankful I've had this job to give me a distraction from everything. This week I was so busy, bringing work home for the first time since I started and I was exhausted every night. I couldn't believe how quickly Friday came.

I'm relaxing a bit more today since I'll being all around the state this week. Only two days of work! Plus, we have FreedomFest on Saturday, the post's Independence Day celebration.

How was YOUR weekend?

Day 238: MilSpouse Friday Fill-in

2011-06-24T16:26:00.004-05:00

Woo hoo! It's Friday which means it's time for the weekend and the Friday Fill-In! If you have a blog, feel free to join in by visiting Wife of A Sailor's blog and linking up. She posts them on Thursdays so it gives you creative thinkers some more time to craft your response. Or you can slack and do it toward the end of the day like me. Ha ha. But on to the questions!

1. Are you a different person than you were five years ago? submitted by Sisterly Thoughts

Yes and no. See, when I was younger, from middle school through half of college, I had a serious attitude. I didn't think before I spoke and had words that would bite right through your body. Needless to say, I was a good, yet cruel arguer. In recent years, pretty much since I met the Mr., I've calmed down. My interests and personality, other than the attitude part, are still the same.

2. If you could go on Amazing Race, who would you take with you as your partner and why? submitted by Thoughts from a Poekitten

I don't know too much about "Amazing Race." I looked it up on Wikipedia (it's okay, you can laugh that I don't know what this is). I would totally take the Mr. as my partner. If the clues for the next destination detail any information about a future location, the Mr. would do great. Plus, it would be fun to see so many interesting places with him at my side.

3. Does Facebook or Twitter actually bring more stress or good in to your life? submitted by Just an Arizona Girl

It doesn't bring stress into my life, but I can see how it does so for others. See, Facebook postings can just get on another person's nerves and create backlash, which creates more backlash and makes people upset. Of course it isn't Facebook's fault -- it's the fault of the user. I've heard about Facebook causing trust issues in a relationship because some girl posts on another girl's husband's wall (whew, that was a confusing sentence). Again, it's the fault of the user that it causes stress, not the actual network.

4. June is National Soul Food Month- what’s your soul food? submitted by NH Girl Displaced

Okay, I don't know what defines something as a soul food (yeah, I live in the South and don't know that term. So sue me). Is it comfort food? If so, a good old Shepherd's Pie is my favorite. I make a MEAN Shepherd's Pie. From scratch. YUMMY!

5. If you could live in any other era than the current, which one would it be & why? submitted by Sugar in My Grits

Probably the 40's and 50's. There is something about the way the country acted more as a union and was more connected (minus the lack of recognition of the Civil Rights Movement). The men were off to war and the women were taking up their jobs to keep the homefront functioning. The fashion of both those decades is awesome too. I think of "Mad Men" and wish society still valued dressing more formally. You know, a hat and gloves to church. But maybe I admire the nostalgia more than I would enjoy living it. It's kind of the whole women-only-working-in-the-house kind of thing. I'd want a career outside of it.

What about YOU? Feel free to answer in the comments section below!

Day 237: Champagne Thursday

2011-06-23T18:30:00.002-05:00

Thursday is finally here, which means it's time for me to list what I'm celebrating this week!

1. Tomorrow is Friday

Yes, this week, it's that simple. I've had such a busy week with work and am ready for a few days off. Keep reading to learn why. I look forward to two days to do whatever I want. No staring at a computer screen all day, typing or dealing with work. Yep, that easy.

2. My parents are coming Tuesday!

My parents scheduled this trip over 5 months ago and they're finally coming to visit me here! This will be their first time in the deep South and at my house. I can't wait for them to see the area. That is why I've been working ahead. I have work next week that I need to have finished by Monday. But, at least it has a payoff!

3. Three days off work next week!

With my recent vacation and taking off this week, you guys probably think I never work. Ha! Yeah, I probably shouldn't take as much time off as I do, but I don't care. I keep track of my house and make sure I always work them off. But really, I'm not sad at all to be missing a few days.

4. Traveling

With any good visit with the parents, it's important to show them around and go some fun places! We'll hopefully being hitting up the zoo, which I think is great here. Everything else is up to them, but I plan on tagging along if I can!

What are YOU celebrating this week?

Day 236: Writer Wednesday

2011-06-22T20:40:00.004-05:00

Like most of my blogging lately, it has been a while since I've blogged about any books I've read! So let me introduce on for all my MilSpouses out there.

Confessions of a Military Wife -- Mollie Gross
Not only did I have the chance to meet and interview this incredible lady, but she is a great writer. Mollie is a comedienne and was a Marine wife for 4 years. Since then, she does comedy tours based around her book for all military spouses across all branches.

In her book, Mollie tells the story of her life as a Marine wife. From how she met her husband, to her first PCS, to her first deployment. Reading this book will make you realize how normal your emotions are. Mollie tells an honest story of her experiences, giving military wives everywhere the chance to laugh and relate.

Mollie came to our post for Spouse Appreciation Day on May 6. I was covering the event and really enjoyed listening to her speak and her stories. The book is definitely worth a read!

Day 234: Weekend Wrap-up

2011-06-20T19:05:00.003-05:00

Whew! This weekend went by FAR too fast. I think time should just slow down on the weekends and then speed by during the week. But I guess we just aren't that lucky.

Friday night I had an FRG meeting. We're trying to get ideas for fundraising and still trying to decide if we're having a formal ball or an informal event to welcome our Soldiers home. Unfortunately, a lot of people want to do something informal, but I really want a ball! See, I love going to the Balls. It's one night out of the year where we can get dolled up, have a great dinner, see our men in their dress blues and dance the night away. I've already found a dress I want, so now I need to see if we will have one! Hopefully we can make a lot of money over the next few months to shoot the ticket prices low so everyone can afford it.

Saturday I spent cleaning up my house. I've been pretty lazy about it and haven't been dusting, so I cleaned and purged! I LOVE purging and getting rid of things that have accumulated over the years, but we no longer use or need. Soon we'll be getting rid of the bedroom set in our spare bedroom. I'm tired of not being able to use that space. To make use of it, I told the Mr. I would like to make it a "man cave" for him when he gets back. See, he's used to having his own space and I think, when he comes back, having that room will be easier for reintegration. Plus then the room is used and not filled with things we don't use.

Sunday I spent working from home and having dinner with two of my closest friends here. My parents are coming down next week, so I've been working ahead so I could take a few days off next week. I'm so PSYCHED to see my parents and show them where I'm living.

How was YOUR weekend?

Day 231: Friday Fill-in

2011-06-17T20:04:00.003-05:00

It has been such a long time since I did one of these and it's about time I get back on track! If some of you are knew to the MilSpouse blogosphere, it's hosted by Wife of A Sailor. You can check out her page to get the fill-in on Thursday to post on your blog Friday. Just be sure that you link up at her site so she can see your answers! It's been a long time since I've participated, so I may be a little out of practice!

This week’s questions are:

1. Underwear Parties, how old is too old? submitted by Wookie & Co.

I don't know what Underwear Parties are, so I decided to Google them. Apparently, after viewing an article about it, it's when people attend parties in their underwear. From what I saw, it's common in college. Now, I know that underwear doesn't show much more than bathing suits do, nowadays. I wouldn't have an Underwear Party with my friends, but having on with my husband is definitely not out of the question ;)

2. What was your favorite class in high school? submitted by Adventures of M-Squared

This is an easy one. I definitely loved English. I loved writing, reading and learning about different literature from different time periods. I was also a huge fan of art classes. When I had open blocks for classes, I filled them with as many art classes as I could. I did painting, photography, ceramics, modern art, jewelry making, metalworking and so many others!

3. Have you ever convinced packers/movers to pack something they aren’t supposed to for a PCS? submitted by Ground Control to Major Mom

The only things they didn't pack for us were lightbulbs and cleaning products. I can't complain about moving those things.

4. Blogging plays a growing role in the media. If you were asked to embed as a blogger with a deployed military unit, would you go? What do you think your blog would be like? submitted by To the Nth

My dream job is to be an embedded reporter. With now having a reporting background, I would JUMP at the chance! I still have dreams of pursuing that goal, but I would have to clear it with my husband first. Even if I was working as an actual reporter, I would continue my blog. Granted, I couldn't blog about everything, as that isn't always allowed, but I would try to relay the realities of what deployed service members face. The dangers, their worries, their feelings. I would try to have emotionally fueled stories rather than actual news stories.

5. Do you think kids should attend year-round school? submitted by Marrying the Navy

I've always been a fan of year-round school. I think it helps keep kids focused, so teacher's don't have to waste time pulling the kids back and reviewing after the three month summer vacation. I think it would need to be treated like college breaks. Give them time in the winter from mid-December to after New Years, then a brief "spring break," and also give them a few weeks of summer vacation. It saves parents from paying for babysitters for long amounts of time, but still provides breaks for the students.

Day 228: Happy 236th Birthday, Army!

2011-06-14T17:20:00.002-05:00

To the brave men and women of the United States Army, past and present, loved and lost, deployed and at home, thank you for your service. Because of dedicated Soldiers like you, the Army has lasted the 236 years.

Day 226: Well, hello there, blog!

2011-06-12T17:30:00.004-05:00

Boy have I been away for a while!

I'm sorry you haven't been hearing from me as often, but things have been very busy.

Work consumes a lot of my time and normally, when I get home, I'm so tired that I veg out and then go to sleep, only to resume the daily grind. I promise I haven't fallen off the earth just yet.

I recently returned from a week-long vacation to Topsail Island, NC. I went with one of my Army wife friends and her children and met up with a Marine girlfriend I met through MilSpouse. It was a great time to relax and clear my head. I get incredibly stressed with work sometimes that I need those moments to recuperate. We spent almost all day every day at the beach and rarely got out of the sun. Needless to say, I've developed a nice tan despite my pale skin and now my face is one big freckle. Even my hair lightened a bit. But don't worry, I wore plenty of sun screen to protect myself.

We didn't have a single day of rain, forcing off the beautiful white sand and out of the blue water. We looked for seashells, built sand castles, laid in the sun, kept cool with a soft breeze and played in the ocean. We even went for a wine tasting, which hosted both local and international wines. They were delicious. We had a great dinner out with some fresh seafood (and even snuck in a Tequila shot, which, for the record, I will never do again. I suffered one of the worst hangovers, even though I didn't drink anymore than the other ladies. So I blame the Tequila!). The drive was over 18 hours each way, but I would do it again for sure!

The time away really made me miss the Mr. Do you ever have those moments where you're tired of being home alone, but when you go away, you only want to be home because that is where you have reminders of your deployed loved one? That's how I felt. I enjoyed the therapeutic aspects of the beach, but really missed having my pictures of the Mr., being in our bed and having his things surrounding me. Removing all aspects of him really made me miss him more. But hey, that could just be me.

I'm still hearing from the Mr. quite often and I'm always grateful for that. To some, talking every day might be a bad thing, but I'm thankful for every minute we can talk. Even if he just shoots me an e-mail with one line saying he's doing well, he misses me and he loves me, that's all I need.

It's hard to believe he'll be home in 138 days. That seems so few compared to the 365 days when he first left. We're reaching the 3/4 mark and I couldn't be happier. We keep talking about what we will do when he's back and fortunately, he will have tons of leave days to use up, meaning we can take weekend trips and long trips home (that is, if work allows).

Have you taken any summer vacations to the beach or elsewhere? Tell me about it!

Day 210: Memorial Day through the eyes of an Army wife

2011-05-27T12:01:00.001-05:00

I wrote a commentary for this weeks post newspaper:

The meaning of Memorial Day has evolved over the years since its creation. The first Memorial Day was observed May 30, 1868, intended to remember Civil War dead. After World War I, the meaning was changed to include remembrance of all service members killed in the line of duty in any war. Unfortunately, many celebrate the holiday as just another day off, not as a day of remembrance. I was one of those people.

Someone once told me that a lot of people aren’t concerned with things that don’t directly affect them. I think that’s true. It’s easy to get wrapped up in our lives unconcerned about things outside of us. It doesn’t make us selfish, but rather shows what is most important to us. With less than 1 percent of the United States population serving in the military, it comes as little military, it comes as little surprise to me that remembering the lost is not as important to those unaffiliated with the military.

Until I was 19, I viewed Memorial Day as a time for parades and cook-outs, the final leg of school and the first taste of summer. I never thought deeply about what it meant. I was too focused on myself. My grandfather is a 20-year Army veteran who served multiple tours to Vietnam. He talked openly about his experiences in the Army, but never discussed his deployments.

From elementary to high school, I twirled baton for a majorette corps. The first parade of the year was always in Parkesburg, Pa. on the Saturday before Memorial Day. Even with the moment of silence, 21-gun salute and veterans from a variety of wars, I didn’t focus on the meaning.

I met my husband in the fall of 2007. He was an Army reservist at the time and was my first run-in with a person who boldly wanted to serve their country. He hadn’t deployed, but his perspective left an impression on me. I finally understood dedication to country. It was the first time I looked at the holiday’s original meaning.

Memorial Day is about sacrifice. It’s about the brave men and women who choose to serve this country and lay down their lives for it. While that is the original intent, I tend to take it a step further. I believe Memorial Day is about all forms of sacrifice. Until living on an Army post, I never noticed the variety of sacrifice, but it comes in many forms: Time without family, suffering physical or mental disability, a service member losing a part of them after seeing what they see and, most importantly, death.

I moved to this post in May 2010 knowing my husband would deploy later that year. It was my first Memorial Day on a military installation and my first true understanding of the holiday. I began to understand the commitment to this nation — seeing men and women proudly serving and spouses alongside them, some of whom would soon say tearful goodbyes as their Soldiers deployed.

It’s important to observe the day for what it is — a day of remembrance for the United State’s fallen heroes, those who had hopes of coming home and rejoining their families. When having cookouts, going to parades or attending festivals, take time to remember those who cannot be with their families, both those who have been lost and those who bravely serve overseas.

Day 184: Weekend blur

2011-05-01T15:22:00.003-05:00

Whew!

It was a wonderful weekend and I got a lot of things done. I cleaned Friday since I get out of work early, letting me avoid cleaning on the weekend.

Yesterday I had a small bout of retail therapy, buying a few little things for the house and a bunch of things for another care package. Since I seemed to have no idea Easter was last Sunday, I forgot about doing an Easter package for the Mr. Normally, I try to send him one for every holiday, with a bunch of holiday related items in it.

This one was a pretty boring, but at least it's a bunch of items he needs. So it's useful, I guess.

I've been relaxing with books, movies and music for the rest of the weekend. I've started playing piano a bit more. It's a great way to clear my head from the stress of work and the deployment. Definitely trying to keep that up!

How was YOUR weekend?

Day 182: Officially over the hump

2011-04-29T21:27:00.005-05:00

I know I seem to be dropping off for weeks at a time, but I promise I'm still around! I'm going to do my best to continue blogging daily. So I'll do my best not to disappear anymore!

I do have to share this:

Yep, you aren't seeing things. We are OFFICIALLY halfway done with this deployment. It has been six incredibly long months, but we're now on the downward slope. The job has been keeping my mind off missing him too much. The internet has been down on his end for the last two weeks, if not longer. He can only send emails from his government computer. I still get emails and 5 minute phone call conversations when he can manage, but any little bit helps!

I have no idea where the time has gone. I feel like he just left to go back after R&R, but he's been back there for over a month. Having a job sure beats sitting alone every day trying to keep myself busy. Before I was working, I was bored at home because I was tired of doing the same things all the time. I didn't have anything to fully occupy my mind, which meant more time to think. And thinking to deeply is never a good thing. I was often tired and had serious mood swings, maybe even coupled with a hint of depression.

Now my mind is working for most of the day. I'm happier and still have no idea how time is passing this much faster. At this rate, the Mr. will be home before I know it!

On another note, I will be taking a vacation with three other military wives this summer. We've already booked our house and have made the official plans. It will be one week with a bunch of military wives whose husband's are deployed. I'm sure we all could use a nice getaway. Definitely excited for that!

With the warm weather working its way in, are YOU planning a summer getaway?

Wounded warrior displays strength and dedication to country

2011-04-15T17:29:00.003-05:00

Here is the story I wrote about the wounded soldier in Afghanistan. I did not include his name, as I don't feel right using his name on my blog without his permission. I hope you still take this incredible story to heart.

"FORT POLK, La. — The United States Army Soldier’s Creed is a standard by which all Soldiers are encouraged to live. It neither discriminates based on rank nor years of experience. The creed focuses on loyalty, duty, selfless service, honor, integrity and personal courage. Many Soldiers practice these core values daily.

One Soldier, Sgt., ___ Company, ___ Combat Team, ___ Division, demonstrated these values during his life-changing experience with the Army.

The unit was deployed to Wardak Province, Afghanistan in mid-October. One of their responsibilities was route clearance. Their focus was on the Tangi Valley, an area that had little American presence.

In November, they were clearing a route early in the morning and encountered a device that disabled their vehicle. After a while, they restarted route clearance, only to encounter arms contact. The Soldiers halted dismounted clearance and returned to their vehicles.

They worked their way through a villa that had a series of “S” turns when Sgt.’s truck was struck by a rocket-propelled grenade. Sgt. immediately turned to driver, Pvt. ___, who was killed in the attack. Sgt. tried to give Pvt. aid. “My first thought was to render aid to Private ___, but after a moment, I realized he was dead and there wasn’t a chance to resuscitate him,” said Sgt.

A medic arrived at the vehicle, instructing Sgt. to get out of the truck so he could assist. “That’s when I realized I had injured my arm,” said Sgt. The medic told Sgt. to sit and calm down. “I actually wanted to grab my weapon and pull security. I tried to argue, but he said no. Then he started treating me,” said Sgt.

Sgt. was so focused on his fellow Soldier, that he never noticed his own wounds. He took shrapnel in his left arm, with a piece severing the central nerve in his hand. Shrapnel was also embedded in his left leg and hip region. The worst injury was a cut to his common carotid artery, the main artery that carries blood and oxygen through the neck to the brain.

“They quickly rendered first aid and got me medically evacuated. Their expedience and professionalism definitely saved my life,” said Sgt. He was airlifted to Bath, Afghanistan, then to Landstuhl, Germany, where he had emergency surgery. A stint was placed in his neck to help control bleeding.

He was sent to Fort Bragg, N.C. for additional treatment, where his parents arrived 45 minutes after he did. During the flight, the stint in his neck shifted place, requiring additional surgery. Sgt. received in-patient care for 14 days and worked through occupational therapy and rehabilitation before returning to Fort __ about three weeks ago.

“I jumped up and down to get sent back here. I should have been there (Fort Bragg) for a few more months, but I didn’t want to get assigned there and not be at Fort ____ when my Soldiers come back. I pretty much forced them to give me return to duty orders here,” said Sgt.

Fort Bragg’s Warriors in Transition Unit gave him a tool to put around his hand to help develop additional range of motion. “I was so infuriated that I couldn’t use my hand, I did nothing but work with it all day, every day. With that, I got the majority of my strength and motion back. I have about 35 degrees of motion pulling my hand backward to do now. It’s one of those things that just takes time,” said Sgt.

While Sgt. has come a long way with rehabilitation, he still has a lot of work ahead of him, he said. He starts additional therapy soon.

While many in the civilian sector would consider ending a job that caused so much damage to their body, many Soldiers feel a duty to their country and their fellow Soldiers and continue their job. On April 7, Sgt. re-enlisted in the Army.

“My people are so important to me. My job as a non-commissioned officer is a meaningful and purposeful thing to do in life. It’s something that I feel I’m good at and I want to continue doing. I enjoy training Soldiers, dealing with their issues, even if it’s aggravating at 2 a.m. Having that task and purpose is really what drives me. I couldn’t imagine doing anything else,” said Sgt.

The bond between Soldiers is another reason he chose to re-enlist. This bond is difficult for anyone to understand unless they have experience as a Soldier, said Sgt. “There is nothing in the world like it. I have friends I went to war with in Iraq and Afghanistan that I would do absolutely anything for and they would do the same for me. When you go through combat with people and support each other, you have friendships that develop that are stronger than anything,” he said.

Sgt. decided to join the Army when he was unhappy with where he was in life. His father was a Vietnam veteran and Sgt. spent a lot of time around people who were in the military, who prompted his interest.

“I needed a change and I figured this would be a big time change. The Army has been good to me and I see no reason to get out. This is a place where I fit in — where I’ve made the best friends I ever had. I can’t see walking away from that,” said Sgt.

After injuries, many Soldiers yearn to rejoin their units. They want nothing more than to be there to protect their fellow Soldiers and ensure their safety.

“The physical stuff is easy for me to deal with. The hardest thing for me is waking up and being here — not with my guys going out on missions every day. The thought of my guys being harmed or going out on simple patrols aggravates me to no end. Civilians ask, ‘why would you want to put yourself in harm’s way?’ I want to put myself in harm’s way so I can help out my people and be there for them when bad things happen. It infuriates me that I can’t do that now,” said Sgt.

Unfortunately, Sgt. has a lot of rehabilitation and requires doctors’ clearances before he is deployable again. “They said it would be six months before my full range of motion came back in my hand and I need to be cleared by vascular surgery as far as the neck stuff goes,” said Sgt.

Despite being unable to return to his unit, Sgt. does his best to stay in contact with his Soldiers. “Their mission set is very demanding, so they don’t have a lot of time to call or be on the Internet. I e-mail back and forth whenever I can,” said Sgt. “I’m proud of all the Soldiers that are still there. I think they deserve a lot more respect than they get now. Route clearance is a hard thing to do. I think every one of those people is a true American hero for what they go out and do every day.”

A day never passes without Sgt. thinking about his unit and what they are doing, he said. “My experience as a whole flashes through my mind at points. Our combat outpost was pretty small, but on either side we were surrounded by mountains and it was beautiful. We had fun goofing off and hanging out in our downtime. When you have hardcore mission sets, doing dangerous route clearance missions on an almost daily basis, your downtime — even the little things like cards, Monopoly, or watching a movie — is that much more meaningful. It’s that difference from looking for bombs and being able to sit down and play cards for a bit,” said Sgt.

The deployment experience changed him, according to Sgt., especially after difficult experiences in a prior deployment to Iraq from late 2007 to early 2009 and his injuries in Afghanistan.

“You really have to go out and make the most of every day and enjoy it. Do your best to be a righteous person. Private ___ no longer has the opportunity to do that. To honor him and everyone else that’s been lost, I have to go out and I have to do the right thing — be a good person. Obviously, there are brethren of mine that don’t have the opportunity to do that anymore. Work hard and enjoy life. It truly is a gift,” said Sgt."

Day 168: Not quite there...

2011-04-14T18:23:00.003-05:00

I swear I have no idea where this month has gone. We prepped the paper to go to press today and I couldn't believe it was already the 15th. The Mr. has been back in country for almost a month now! It honestly feels like he's been gone for only a couple weeks. I guess the R&R memories are just still fresh in my mind. :)

It's been a good week. I'm getting much better at work and have been compliment on how far I've come the last few days. On a much happier not, I would like to add that one of my stories made it to the of Army News page!

Tomorrow my story on the wounded soldier will be posted here. Unless the story reaches a broader audience, I will edit out his last name and location. I don't feel right using his name for my blog without his permission. My boss is expecting some great feedback on the story and that it has a high chance of being a high profile story.

As I mentioned, my days are flying by! We are almost at the halfway point of this deployment. Almost six months down and we're FINALLY halfway. In due time, we'll be planning our time when he returns! I'm glad that I finally notice how days are passing. The deployment has gotten better, since I'm used to being alone again. It was a huge adjustment after R&R, but I've found my own little groove now.

I'm ready for the weekend! I have no plans, but I DO have "Julie and Julia" and the first disc of the first season of "Mad Men" to watch. It will be so great to sit back, relax and enjoy being alone.

This whole shutdown thing is a huge mess.

2011-04-08T17:13:00.004-05:00

Alright, after watching the news for almost the entire day, I've come to accept one thing.

Our government is acting like four-year-old children who are arguing over which game to play. If you are a person that is blaming only the democrats or only the republicans, you have some research to do. This entire issue is of BOTH parties faults.

I would like to explain a common misconception of this mess. Congress cannot allocate funds specifically for abortions due to the Hyde Amendment. While it is not its own bill, it tends to be added to any bill dealing with allocations of funds to control where money goes and protect against misuse. Money is allocated every year to Medicaid, which fund abortions for women in cases of rape, incest, endangerment of the mother's life and, depending on the state, fetal abnormalities. Some states allow medical insurance to fund the process as well. Planned Parenthood funds abortions based on private funding. On the other hand, states may fund abortions at their own discretion. The funding they used would be money that has not already been allocated to specific area, providing the state with some leeway.

I don't say that as a pro-choice person. I don't agree with abortion at all, but the facts are the facts.

That being said, there is no reason we can't come to agreement in this government. We're headed toward a government shutdown and the biggest issues right now are troop pay and Planned Parenthood.

Here is my compromise, Congress: Cut the funding for Planned Parenthood by 50% the amount allocated in recent years. Democrats get some money going to the organization while the GOP gets a significant cut. Neither side should be bothered by this. After all, as military spouses, we're being told half the normal pay is better than nothing. I guess we can say the same for Planned Parenthood.

This is not about Republicans wanting women to get cancer or Democrats wanting to kill babies (and yes, both of those were said today). It's about politicians seeking re-election at the expense of the American people.

There will be significant issues coming out of this that we will need to deal with. Right now, it isn't about getting what we want; it's about doing what needs to be done. Unemployment is still high, gas and food prices have risen, homes are still in trouble. We don't need more people defaulting on loans or struggling to make ends meet. Forcing people to stay home from work, some of whom won't be payed, is not fair. The American people didn't get to this point because of themselves, they got here by the fault of our own government, both democratic and republican.

Okay, rant over.

Day 160: An incredibly emotional day

2011-04-07T18:01:00.004-05:00

As military spouses, we're always aware of the risks our service members take when they deploy. We know there really isn't a "safe" job and we can only hope for the best and pray.

Today I interviewed a soldier who was wounded in November while in Afghanistan. He was sent home based on his severe injuries, which included a cut carotid artery, a severed central reflex in his hand and shrapnel in his arm, leg, and hip. He never even realized he was injured until a medic came to help another person and saw this soldier's wounds.

He is still recovering from his wounds and still continues to go through rehabilitation and therapy. Unfortunately, he won't be able to rejoin his unit for this tour. He works in rear D until his unit returns.

Hearing this man tell his story was heartwrenching. It was also the most difficult interview I could imagine. How do you just ask someone to describe what happened the day they were injured? When they lost a buddy? When they thought they were going to also lose their own life? I racked my brain and stressed all night last night and all day this morning.

When it came time for the interview, he was so nice. I told him that if something was too in depth or too hard to discuss, all he had to do was say he didn't want to talk about it. He politely answered all my questions though. Rather than leaving the Army after his difficult experience, he chose to re-enlist today.

His devotion to his unit, his fellow soldiers and the Army is difficult for any civilian to truly understand - even a military spouse. When I left the unit headquarters, my eyes teared up. It brought forward the dangers all our service members face. After a while when going through a deployment, I feel military spouses start to forget the dangers of a deployment. This brought forth for me, what our troops endure.

It just goes to show we must always remember to pray for our troops. They serve our country so others don't have to.

To me, that's pretty heroic.

EDIT: The soldier is a combat engineer. His job was to do route clearance until their vehicle was hit with an RPG. When the story runs, I will post it here. It's too great of a story to not be posted. As nothing has been written or published yet, I feel it's best to wait before posting too much information.

Day 157: Slowly moving along

2011-04-04T18:16:00.004-05:00

After an insanely busy week last week, I got the chance to be alone and relax. Some days I leave work so mentally exhausted that I don't even want to watch TV. A TV show's plot is too much for my mind to handle.

During my last post I complained about my slow learning. With my job, it's difficult to get enough one-on-one time to truly learn and grasp every part of the system. The girl I replaced, B, was so helpful. She spent a lot of time explaining things and I took the best notes I could. However, when you work a job that has solid deadlines, it's difficult to ever get enough learning.

Fortunately, the editor and my boss got together to create "Layout Drills" for the writers to complete each week. We layout a page as if we're submitting it into the paper, but instead, the editor and my boss look over them. If we don't do something correctly, they will explain what we did wrong and how to fix it. I think they're doing it for consistency, but also to make sure we're all doing things correctly.

This is such a great thing for me! I'll now have the chance to learn things and understand what I'm doing wrong. Which means I'll get better at my job.

I work with incredible people and really enjoy what I'm doing. I just keep trying to stay positive!

The Mr. made it back in-country and was definitely happy to be back to work. I know he enjoyed his time off for R&R, but I also know he was itching to get back. As always, I look forward to the day he gets home!

On Saturday I went for a 7-mile bike ride with a friend. It felt so great to be exercising again. We also had a gorgeous weekend! I did a little shopping for some new summer work clothes too. Sunday I relaxed and did some laundry in preparation for another busy week!

How was your weekend?

Day 151: Work troubles

2011-03-29T17:03:00.004-06:00

As you all know, I began working for the post newspaper at the end of February. After a brief hiatus for the Mr.'s R&R, I returned to the job and jumped right in.

I love the job. I love Journalism and I love writing. I also feel like I'm in the right place. My only problem is I'm having so many issues with my own work.

I believe I do great work. I feel I bring something special to each story I'm assigned and every event I cover. I also feel I've improved greatly with layout and design. However, since my return, I've been having a lot of issues with style, lining things up, and not having to fix 20 errors on a single story when they go through edits. To someone on the outside, my issues don't sound very bad. You probably think, "well, those are easy fixes." I feel it takes away from me as a journalist.

Whenever I write a story, I try to correct everything myself to decrease my edits. If I hadn't done my own corrections, I would have had about 50 problems with each story. It's frustrating to me that I can't get things right. The simplest problem I have is with style. Read it in a book and it should be easy to fix, right? Apparently not for me.

Granted, I know this is only my second working week. Since my hire date, I've worked 10 days thus far. Most of these things come with time. I'm just worried I won't get as many stories if I keep making so many simple errors. I even had to stay later than usual tonight to finish everything because of all the edits.

I'm proud of how much I learned, and remembered, since I started. I've been working completely alone the last two days and only ask questions if I can't figure it out myself. I hope that it doesn't take me too much longer to get it!

Have you ever had a time where you felt like you couldn't do your job right?

Day 148: And the waiting continues...

2011-03-26T13:12:00.004-06:00

The Mr. left to return to duty on Wednesday, which is the same day I came back to LA. We had an incredible time for the Mr.'s R&R. We spent three nights in D.C. and the rest of the time in a really nice hotel back in PA.

We arrived on the day of our second anniversary, giving us the evening to celebrate. He was exhausted from hectic traveling for five days, which consisted of helicopters, cargo planes, and actual airplanes. He worked hard to get in to Harrisburg 8 hours earlier than expected. I wasn't disappointed at all!

The next day, we drove to D.C. for our three-night trip. The night we arrived we had dinner at the hotel then went to the room and went to sleep. The next day, we bundled up for the Northeastern weather and began a day of sightseeing. We saw the Supreme Court building, the Capitol, the National Crime and Punishment Museum, Madame Tussauds, the National Archives and the National Gallery. We were both tired after that day and went to bed early to rest up for another full day. The next day it was raining and was supposed to rain all day. We went and bought a second umbrella since we only had one and began our morning. Unfortunately, we were going to be outside for most of the day.

We were soaked through quickly. At one point, we were waiting to cross the street. You know how in movies a car will hit a puddle splashing those who stand on the sidewalk? Yeah, that happened. I got most of the puddle, which soaked through every article of clothing I was wearing. We decided to make the trip a little faster. We hit the Korean War memorial, the Lincoln memorial, the Vietnam memorial, the Washington monument and the White House before returning to our room to change. While it wasn't the prettiest day out, it was the best day to take photos since not many people were as crazy to be outside as we were. We changed into dry clothes and spent the rest of the day in museums. We went to the Newseum, the Smithsonian, the Natural History museum and the Museum of American History. After that we were both sore, tired, and completely drained, so we went back to the room and totally crashed!

The next morning we were heading back to PA, but before we left, we went to Arlington National Cemetery. The Mr. was in D.C. once as a really young kid and then again when he ran the Army Ten Miler. He never saw Arlington before. We spent a lot of time wandering through the paths of so many honorable men and women who gave their lives for their country. We visited the grave of Audie Murphy, the most decorated soldier. We also watched the changing of the guard at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier. While The Mr. didn't think the change was as incredible as most civilians, it was still neat to watch. Plus, it was a beautiful day. We also saw the memorial of the Challenger disaster and those who lost their lives during the rescue mission of the Iranian hostages.

We also stumbled across a rehearsal for a Marine funeral. As soon as I saw the caisson with the flag-covered casket, my heart dropped into my stomach and I felt sick. I stood there wondering if it was a woman just like me who lost her husband. What made matters worse was when the Mr. and I saw tourists taking pictures of the caisson. I kept thinking that if it were the Mr.'s funeral and I saw people taking pictures, I would not take it well. I wouldn't want people doing that. The Mr. and I were both furious. To those people it was a spectacle, but to us, it was a possible reality. I felt tears welling in my eyes at how insensitive our fellow Americans can be. We left there and tried to put it out of our minds. We saw the house Robert E. Lee lived in and the very first grave in Arlington - that of Robert E. Lee's sister. We then went to the Kennedy burial area, passing the area where Supreme Court justices and astronauts are buried. After that, we left to make the trek to PA.

The rest of his R&R was spent together, except for a few days of visiting both our families. I was in a state of bliss the entire time. It was amazing waking up with him in the morning again, falling asleep with him at night, and having him with me. I consider him my best friend, so having him to talk to was amazing. Unfortunately, it has to end some time. I didn't get upset or even think about him leaving until the night before.

We woke up around 0400 for us both to take ready and for me to take him to the airport. I did well the whole way there until I had to hug him goodbye. For a second time. I started to tear up, but didn't burst out crying. He kissed me one last time, grabbed his bag, and walked into the airport. I got back in the car with every intention of driving to my parents, but I started to cry too hard. I pulled over to catch my breath and calmed down. After only a few minutes, I was fine. I went back to my parents, had lunch with my best friend of 17 years, and then left to return to the airport.

When I arrived in Atlanta for my layover, the Mr. was still there and he met me at my gate. He sat with me for the 30 minutes I was there and then we hugged and kissed one last time. I got on my plane, a little teary-eyed, but did fine until I got home.

The second time is much harder than the first. I think it's because we get 15 whole, uninterrupted days together, but have to say goodbye and return to everything like the time in between didn't happen. I'm so thankful I have my job to distract me. I returned to work the next day and it kept my mind busy. Which I obviously needed. So now I'm back and continue the waiting, but I'm hoping when he is finally home, all of this will be worthwhile.

So I've Definitely Been MIA Lately...

2011-03-04T14:55:00.003-06:00

Don't worry, I'm still around! It's been an insane last few days for me. As soon as the calendar turned over to March, my free time was completly full!

I don't know if many of you know, by it's that time for R&R for me and the Mr.! While we still have eight months left to this deployment, I'm so psyched to see him! Unfortunately, it also means we're playing the waiting game right now. He was delayed for quite a few days, so my fingers are crossed that he gets home soon!

We have some big plans over the next few weeks, so I don't be blogging for that time. I promise to come back with good stories, great pictures, and so happy I finally got to see my husband! It's been five months since I last kissed him, hugged him, or held his hand.

I can't wait!

A Great Thing to Always Remember

2011-02-25T15:32:00.002-06:00

Click to enlarge

Whether we know them or not, it's always a tragedy when a life is lost. Always keep our troops and families in your prayers.

From http://jennyspouse.com

Day 117: Back at Work!

2011-02-23T18:18:00.004-06:00

Whew! It has been a whirlwind of a week and it's only Wednesday!

I started my Journalism job on Tuesday after having the holiday off and I love it. The only part that sucks is I'm beginning my first week sick. I don't know if I have a cold or if it's allergies, but I've been trying to sleep a lot. I slept for 10 hours last night!

I was thrown into my position very quickly. Yesterday consisted of learning the design program, where to find the pages I need, and how to create certain pages. Today I actually got to go out and do photography work, work along on two pages, and even was assigned my first story!

My first story will be about the Army Wife Network, who is coming to out post tomorrow and Friday. They offer information regarding themed care packages, networking with other wives, deployment survival tips, and give away tons of freebies and door prizes! I volunteered to cover the event since I was already attending, and my boss approved my first article! She thought it was a great suggestion and helps the newspaper focus more on the spouses (since we're pretty non-existent in the post newspaper because it is geared more toward soldiers). I haven't forgotten about you readers or the blogs I read! It's just be incredibly busy!

I will have my own desk and computer by the end of March, so I'll be able to write in my downtime!

MilSpouse Friday Fill-In!

2011-02-18T11:18:00.004-06:00

As usual, Friday means it's time for the MilSpouse Friday fill-in, hosted by Wife of A Sailor. You can check out her page to get the fill-in on Thursday to post on your blog Friday. Just be sure that you link up at her site so she can see your answers! It's been a long time since I've participated, so I may be a little out of practice!

This week’s questions are:

1. What is your favorite MilSpouse blog (not including Wife of a Sailor who we all love, or your own)? submitted by Our Crazy Life (Wifey note: whaaaat? You can’t say my blog? No fun! LOL, just kidding)

It's never easy picking a favorite blog, because I read so many that I love. If you look down the right side of my page, you'll see a list. Those are the blogs I enjoy reading every day.

2. What are your favorite perks about your spouse being deployed (we all know there are perks)? submitted by Ramblings of a Marine Wife

I can cook any kind of food without fear of what he will like or dislike. I can have all the covers at night and take up some extra space in our bed. The biggest thing, however, is that my house stays nice and neat!

3. How long did you date your spouse before getting engaged? Married? submitted by Utterly Chaotic

I dated the Mr. for 9 months before he proposed and we were married six months later! Neither of us have looked back and, despite all our separations, it's been worth it. For the full story, click "About Us" at the top of the page.

4. What do you think your spouse would do if he wasn’t in the military? submitted by Adventures of M-Squared

The Mr. would still be in school working on a Master's or Doctorate in History so he could be a professor. He still has dreams of teaching at West Point and plans on teaching after the Army.

5. If you could talk to the Secretary of (the Army) what is one suggestion you would like to bring to their attention in order to improve the lives of military families? submitted by My Life as His (Air Force) Wife

First, I would like to discuss providing additional programs for children. Some forget that the children are giving a lot up in this life too, they just don't realize it. Something in partnership with the schools to watch for signs of depression after moves or after a parent's deployment.

I would like to adjust the MyCAA to include E-1 to E-5 and O-1 to O-3 and include Bachelor's programs. I think MyCAA did a great job in adding licensures and certifications, but Bachelor's degrees can provide a lasting career. Not all certifications last forever - many need renewed and that renewal depends on the state. A bachelor's degree doesn't require any renewal. Of course, only a certain number of 4-year degree seekers would be accepted for each fiscal year, but it opens up opportunity to many other people.

I also support any kind of program that stresses a strong family on the homefront. I feel like some branches are better at that than others, but if there isn't a strong family at home, we can't expect the family to stay strong when a member goes to war.

What would YOU change for families if you could?

Champagne Thursday: Despite the Distance, We Can Still Celebrate

2011-02-17T14:27:00.009-06:00

With it being Thursday, it's time to post my list of things I'm celebrating this week. I'm sure it isn't hard for you to guess, but I'll post it all anyway.

1. I was officially offered the job to write for the post newspaper and I being working on Monday! I've waited 8 months for this opportunity, so I'm psyched!

2. To celebrate my position, my Mom and Dad sent me a beautiful bouquet of flowers! It was so big, I had trouble finding a place to put it! The amazing thing is we are still able to celebrate holidays and accomplishments despite the distance between us. Sure, it isn't the way any of us would hope, but at least we have the opportunity. I can't wait to celebrate with them in person when I'm home again!

Lilies are my favorite!

3. I've been keeping this in for a while, but in a few short weeks, the Mr. will be back for R&R! It's earlier than I hoped, but I'm grateful for any moment I can share with him!

What are YOU celebrating this week?

Images by: LTArmyWife

The New and Employed, Me!

2011-02-16T15:39:00.003-06:00

As you all know, I've been on the job search for quite some time. I would get interesting leads, prompting multiple interviews, but not phone calls. Today I finally got my chance.

I sent out a resume Monday morning after seeing multiple openings for the post newspaper. The job opening was never closing and they were beginning to get desperate. They posted one final opening that said they were willing to train anyone as long as they could write. That helped me believe I had a really good chance of getting a job.

A few hours after sending my resume, the contractor for the paper called me saying he would like to set up an interview, so he would be getting in touch with the head honcho of the paper. Yesterday, the head of the paper called and invited me in for an interview this morning.

It was a great interview and it was great to meet her. She explained all about the position and about other applicants, only to say that after sifting through so many and finding me, she believed they didn't have to continue looking. That really lifted my spirits! She took a look at my portfolio and thought my articles were very strong and really liked my design samples. When I left, she said she would be in touch with the contractor and, if I didn't receive a call by Friday, to call her back.

A few hours after my interview, the contractor called asking me if I would accept the position. It's only $9 an hour, but I'm not getting the job for money. I need something to keep me busy and help the days pass, so this is a great opportunity.

I'm officially the new and employed working woman!

Writer Wednesday - Service Ettiquette

2011-02-16T12:41:00.004-06:00

Service Etiquette - Cherlynn Conetsco and Anna Hart

In being associated with the military, there are years of etiquette that precede our involvement. The military is immersed in customs and traditions and new spouses are not always aware of them. This book reveals the ins and outs of etiquette, ranging from how to dress for different events, going through a receiving line, flag etiquette, funeral processions, and writing thank you notes and invitations. While some of us can use common sense in determining how to act, dress, or be, refreshers are never negative.

In reading this book myself, I noticed some things are outdated (many no longer use "calling cards" in attending a party). I found the sections on funerals, balls, parties, and even flag etiquette very in depth and modern.

image by: http://choosingcivility.org/serviceetiquette.html

Day 108: Valentine's Day

2011-02-14T15:00:00.005-06:00

It's so strange to think that another holiday has arrived that I'm forced to spend without the Mr. Despite the year long training he did beginning in June 2009, we never missed a holiday.

This time last year I was surprising him with a romantic getaway to a place called, "The Inn of the Dove." They're a well known establishment in Harrisburg, PA and I wanted to do something extremely special for the Mr. He was impatiently waiting for the delivery truck to bring my gift of beautiful flowers, a teddy bear, and a combination of bath salts, shower gel, and bubble bath.

This year, I'm sitting in a new state, in a new house, and alone for the holiday. I've always been one of those people who thought Valentine's Day was extremely overrated, but I enjoyed being with my boyfriend, fiance, and then husband. The Mr. and I have never done many special things for it, but we've always spent it together.

Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's Day, and now Valentine's Day have come and gone with him away. I've been fortunate enough to be surrounded by wonderful friends and family who have helped me (and each other) through the holidays without him.

I posted this on my Facebook: "This year, my Valentine is on the other side of the world. We may not get to have a fancy meal, go out on the town, or exchange gifts in person, but those things are easily replaced by Skype, packages in the mail, and hearing his voice on the phone. It's the little things that make it all better. I love you, Mr.♥"

When I take the time to step back away from my own "misery," I realize that I, in fact we as military spouses, have something special that many "civilians" don't normally experience. We can send packages to our husbands to keep them strong while they're away. We can write hand-written letters with the upside-down stamp to send to foreign countries. We get incredible gifts in the mail that we cannot purchase in the United States. We are also free from the feeling of "contentedness" and taking our spouses for granted because we never know how long they will be home or away. We get the chance to develop a strong sisterhood of women who support each other through good times and bad. We get the chance to prove we are strong, independent women who are able to soften when our husbands our safely in our arms.

And what's better than that?

Image by: "gagic" at www.fliiby.com

Party Successes?

2011-02-11T19:34:00.003-06:00

Last week I blogged about my Un-Valentine's Day Celebration. It was supposed to be a potluck dinner and I could have a wide number of guests.

Well, my party was yesterday and it wasn't much of a success. Only three people showed up of the seven who RSVP'd. I had an exorbitant amount of food that I tried to send home with people. My plan for games never happened because there weren't enough people to play them. Fortunately I didn't spend a ton of money.

I've discovered a new pet peeve - sending out invitations and people don't respond. Obviously it's great to know the "yes" responses, but I find it important to get the "no" responses, so I'm sure my invitation made it to them. I made it simple by sending out an eVite (if you haven't used this before you should) - the invitation process doesn't get much easier. An invitation is sent to an email inbox, people click to view it, then click either yes, no, or maybe. And then it's done. Of the 40-some odd people I sent the invitation two, I got a total of 10 responses. Is it really that hard to just say no? I'm also bothered when people say yes and then never show. At least call me or text me to tell you won't be able to make it.

One of my best friends here couldn't make it last minute because her little boy was sick. She made the dessert for the evening and I could see her son was flushed from his fever. Obviously childcare doesn't accept sick kids, but at least she told me.

Rumor has it that many people chose not to come because they didn't like that their children weren't invited. Now, I can understand that thought, but my home is not childproofed, I have no toys for kids, and I have no place for them to play. The kids would have had to be in the same room as the adults, meaning there would be very little room at all.

On the other hand, the guys are deployed. My thought is that the mom's, who are acting as single parents, would like some time to be adults - adult conversation, fun games, and not having to worry about children. Apparently I was wrong. My best friend has two young boys and she was more than willing to drop them off in childcare for a night of adult fun, only to have them get sick and keep her inside. I guess since I don't have children, I wouldn't understand.

Overall, it was a fun night. I made pasta, salad, and garlic bread, and we had a nice time talking and laughing. I almost liked it better not having a large group (and the other ladies said the same thing). It was a lot of clean up, but I would definitely do it again!

Have you ever thrown any parties for your friends? Was it a fun experience?

We've Made it to Day 100!

2011-02-06T16:00:00.003-06:00

I caved after the Mr.'s deployment began and downloaded a "Doughnut of Misery." I don't normally look at it daily, maybe once every couple weeks, but after looking at it today, I saw we have reached Day 100.

That means it has been 100 days since I last kissed, snuggled, hugged, or held hands with my husband. It also means I'm about 1/3 of the way through the deployment.

I've had my rough spots, where I crawl into bed for another night without him and cry my eyes out. I've had days where I felt no reason to do anything because I was alone. I've wanted to curl up in a ball and forget I have a life to live. But those are just the bad times.

Obviously I would rather be with him then on my own, but my time alone hasn't been torturous. It's been a time of reflection for me, to think about how our marriage was and how I can make it better. Many of you know that the Mr. and I married late in our college life. We moved in together in May of 2009 and he left the following June. We weren't able to live together again until May of 2010 and he deployed in October. In almost two years of marriage, we've only been together for seven months.

When we finally lived together at his first duty station, it was difficult for us to get used to each other. We spent so much time apart that we had to get to know each other again. Shortly before the Mr.'s deployment, I bought a few books on marriage and have learned so many things to apply when he gets back. I'm sure it will make the "redeployment" much easier for both of us.

I've also grown closer to some amazing women who are so supportive. Every Tuesday night, I get together with my two best friends here and we have a nice dinner, drink some wine, and eat some good desserts! I look forward to it every week and it helps the weeks go by faster.

I'm still on the job search and hoping that things turn up. I think having a job would really speed up the weeks and months. I'm still waiting to hear back from one job. I've considered volunteering, but there aren't many places accepting volunteers right now. I'm keeping my hopes up!

Who are we as Military Spouses?

2011-02-05T15:35:00.004-06:00

I wanted to share this with all of you. My Grandmother sent me a card today and in it was a yellowed newspaper article from the early 80s. She was a 20-year Army wife, having a husband deployed on multiple tours to both Korea and Vietnam. She thought I would appreciate having this article. I hope you all enjoy it as much as I did. It sums up who we are as military spouses.

Give a Shout for Military Wives - Featured in an Ann Landers Column

The good Lord was creating a model for military wives and was into his sixth day of overtime when an angel appeared. She said, "Lord, you seem to be having a lot of trouble with this one. What's wrong with the standard model?"

The Lord replied, "Have you seen the specs on this order? She has to be completely independent, possess the qualities of both father and mother, be a perfect hostess to four or 40 with an hour's notice, run on black coffee, handle every emergency imaginable without a manual, be able to carry on cheerfully, even if she is pregnant and has the flu, and she must be willing to move to a new location 10 times in 17 years. And oh, yes, she must have six pairs of hands."

The angel shook her head. "Six pairs of hands? No way."

The Lord continued, "Don't worry, we will make other military wives to help her. And we will give her an unusually strong heart so it can swell with pride in her husband's achievements, sustain the pain of separations, beat soundly when it is overworked and tired, and be large enough to say, 'I understand,' when she doesn't, and say, 'I love you,' regardless."

"Lord," said the angel, touching his army gently, "Go to bed and get some rest. You can finish this tomorrow."

"I can't stop now," said the Lord. "I am so close to creating something unique. Already this model heals herself when she is sick, can put up six unexpected guests for the weekend, wave goodbye to her husband from a pier, a runway or a depot, and understand why it's important that he leave."

The angel circled the model of the military wife, looked at it closely and sighed, "It looks fine, but it's too soft."

"She might look soft," replied the Lord, "but she has the strength of a lion. You would not believe what she can endure."

Finally, the angel bent over and ran her finger across the cheek of the Lord's creation. "There's a leak," she announced. "Something is wrong with the construction. I am not surprised that it has cracked. You are trying to put too much into this model."

The Lord appeared offended at the angel's lack of confidence. "What you see is not a leak," he said. "It's a tear."

"A tear? What is it there for?" asked the angel.

The Lord replied, "It's for joy, sadness, pain, disappointment, loneliness, pride, and dedication to all the values that she and her husband hold dear."

"You are a genius!" exclaimed the angel.

The Lord looked puzzled and replied, "I didn't put it there."

-Author Unknown

Happy Un-Valentine's Day

2011-01-30T23:36:00.002-06:00

In February, I will be hosting my first Un-Valentine's Day Celebration!

A lot of people ask, what is an un-valentine?

With all the husbands within the troop being deployed, I feel like Valentine's Day can be tough on the wives who are left at home. The one thing we truly want is our husbands by our sides to exchange cute gifts, have romantic dinners, and whisper sweet nothings across the table. With the holiday being so focused around love and loving the one you're with, the day can be saddening.

In order to lift spirits, I wanted to do something special for the wives, so I decided to hold a party. What can make us feel better other than drinking, games, and fun?

I'm still trying to work out the logistics of it all. I could have any number of guests from 1-41, so I'm trying to plan accordingly. So far, I've decided to do a potluck, that way, I know there is plenty of food! My theme is going to be "Cupid Can Stuff It" and am trying to see if I can buy a cupid pinata for us. I mean, fun never hurts, does it? Well, unless you're the cupid.

I'm between making one of my famous yummy desserts or else "bleeding cookies." I just don't want the party to seem like I'm hating on Valentine's Day, which is why I didn't call it an Anti-Valentine's Day.

Of course, there will be a game of Left-Right-Center so we can have some fun (other than the pinata) and maybe win some money! If you haven't played it, you really should get a group of women together. I haven't found the game yet, but I hope I can, or at least borrow it from a friend. The game has three dice, with each die labeled with left, right, or center, as opposed to the numbers of regular dice. Each player enters the game with three $1 bills and all players sit in a circle. Each player rolls one at a time and follows the command of the dice. If it says "left," the player passes the dollar to the left, pass right if it says "right," and leaves a dollar in the center if it says "center." It's possible to roll all of one kind, which means the player instantly loses all the dollars. Depending on what other players roll, it's possible to re-enter the game. The last person with a dollar in their hands is the winner and they receive all the dollar bills.

Some choose to play the game with chips and the winner receives a prize. I haven't decided what to do yet. I'm meeting with my two friends on Tuesday, so I'll definitely be asking their opinion on things.

Have you ever held a party like this? Do you have any ideas to make it even better?

Champagne Thursday

2011-01-27T13:38:00.004-06:00

It's Champagne Thursday!

For those of you that don't know, this is when I pick a few things from the week that I'm celebrating. They aren't always what some people would consider a celebration, but I like to think of them as being positives!

Here is what I'm celebrating this week:

1. The Wives Coffee held a Bunco night last night and I won $10!

2. I tried my hand at a Tiramisu on Tuesday, but it didn't turn out very well. I'm happy for the practice that I had! Maybe I can try again soon.

3. I finally finished the Mr.'s Valentine's Day package! Now I just need to send it off tomorrow! I'll be sure to do a post on it once he receives it!

4. I applied for another job! For those of you who have been following my blog since July, that Marketing Assistant position opened up again! I decided to apply for it again, so my fingers are crossed that it is finally the right time!

5. I found out the Mr.'s R&R date, so I've begun planning for that. We'll be back in PA so he can see both sides of the family. Fortunately, we will be staying in hotels so we can still have our own time. I'll be sure to have pictures to share!

6. I've only recently discovered "Sex and the City." I never thought I would like it as much as I do! How did I make it so long without ever seeing it?

What are you celebrating this week?

Don't forget to check out my blog post from yesterday. I'm still accepting questions for tomorrow's blog post!

Wouldn't You Like to Know?

2011-01-26T15:39:00.003-06:00

I've seen a lot of bloggers doing this (Flip Flops and Combat Boots and Soldier's Lady to name a few). I love the idea and thought I would do the same!

I've been blogging now for 8 months and have been loving learning about those of you who read my blog. I never thought so many of you would be interested! But have you ever wondered something about me and never asked? Now you can!

So here you go. I'm opening up myself to answer any and all your questions. You can either post them as a comment on this post or you can email them to me.

On Friday, I will post my responses!

So . . . Have at it and happy asking!

Reality TV Pet Peeves

2011-01-24T22:46:00.005-06:00

As many women who are currently facing deployments, I like to drown my sorrows with wine and reality TV, primarily through Bravo, the royalty of all reality TV. I watch all the shows and normally have no issue with them. As I've been watching more, I've discovered my pet peeves.

1. Overuse of the word, "like"

I don't know why people must incessantly use the word "like" to fill the void of unspoken words. Why can't they just pause to collect their thoughts and then continue on? They aren't giving a speech, they're just talking. So it's okay to pause! If people use "like" so often, I begin counting how often they say "like' rather than focusing on the words they say. That's not a good thing.

2. Saying "I'm over it" when you clearly aren't

Yeah, this happens far too often on reality TV. People are clearly ticked off about an issue, claim they're "over it," but then they continue to complain about their issue. Clearly, you are not over it, so stop claiming you are. Duke it out until the issue is solved and then you can be over it.

3. Too much make-up

Maybe I've watched "Real Housewives" too much, but the thick layers of make-up is just disgusting. Most of you are beautiful without make-up, so just take it easy with that brush and foundation. Make it look natural. That way, when you go without make-up, it isn't such a drastic change. And fake eyelashes? I find them frightening.

4. Humongous houses

Okay, I can see people wanting a library or a study, but when your house is so big you can't hear someone yelling your name, then that's a good sign it's too big. I'm surprised they haven't yet lost a child.

5. The double cheek air kiss

This is a little crazy and I don't quite understand it. I don't mind when women hug upon meeting or saying goodbye to one another, but the air kissing? If you aren't in Europe or Russia, then please abstain from doing that. I can't stand hearing the "muah, muah" as you fake-kiss each other on the cheek. Plus, after doing that to ten or so people? It gets annoying.

6. Crazy amounts of swearing

Don't people realize they can give the same message with a lighter use of expletives? When I'm watching the show, I get tired of hearing, beep, beep, beep, beep, in one sentence. And when you're arguing? Totally uncalled for. It makes it even harder for someone to listen to you giving your point. It just sounds like an attack.

Do you watch reality TV? What's your favorite show? Do you have any reality TV pet peeves?

MilSpouse Happenings: Women in Combat

2011-01-21T17:03:00.009-06:00

As many of you know, I follow the message boards on milspouse.com and comment frequently on whatever issue someone posts. This weeks most interesting debate is over women serving in combat. This is apparently an important topic for a lot of spouses, as the debate reached five pages in little over 24 hours. I was apprehensive about blogging on this topic for a number of reasons, but I feel it is an important issue to the military community.

According to the www.womensmemorial.com site there are about 404,237 women currently serving in the military (all branches, active and reserve/guard). Of those about 21,000 are currently in Iraq or Afghanistan and nearly 195,000 have been deployed there (number from an article from Northwestern University from 2008, although more have probably been there now).

In my personal view, I believe that women should be allowed to fight in combat, right on the "front lines" with the men. I'm a strong believer in creating a stronger, equality driven Army. This does not mean, however, that I believe the Army should lower its standards to allow more women to enter combat. And of course, I have some sort of plan in mind.

It means that women and men will be subject to equal PT tests, training scores, etc. They will take the ASVAB to determine their MOS. The ASVAB, as it is now, will be equal across the board, only this time, it will allow women to test into combat arms branches. If these women test in, they will then go to their infantry, armor, etc. MOS school, where they will be subject to the same standards that are presently in place for the men. The standard will not be a middle ground between the men and women; instead, the women will have to increase strength, stamina, and other forms of power to compete with the men. If the women cannot reach the acceptable standard for their MOS, they will be put in a different one and not be accepted into combat. After reaching their duty station and officially joining a combat arms brigade, they will always have to meet the male standards for all future tests.

Now, with that being said, women will have the option to opt out of combat arms MOS's, if they test into them. I've been researching online, but can't tell what scores qualify for what branch. Women would need to understand that when moving into a combat MOS, they would be held to higher standards than other branches and expected to perform proficiently.

I know a lot of people will disagree with me or with my reasoning - and that's okay. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. MilSpouse posted a poll on whether or not women should serve in combat and the results are very close. Out of 333 responses, 53% support women in combat, while 46% are against it.

Not to go all "G.I. Jane" on this idea, but what if the Army implemented the idea of "test cases," where women were able to try their hand at combat branches? I don't know what cost would be or what other elements would need to be considered, but it seems like a good start. That way, there doesn't need to be the worry of large numbers of women "losing it" in a combat situation. The test cases would provide the government an opportunity to see how women would act in battle. Overall, government funding wouldn't increase because it is like training a male soldier to do the job.

Spouses on the board listed many reasons they would not want women in combat:

1. Women do not have equal physical strength to men.
2. Women must deal with periods, pregnancy, rape, yeast infections, etc. due to their biology.
3. Women would be unable to drag a full grown man wearing combat gear to safety.
4. Women serving in combat could cause men to lose focus during battle.
5. Women serving in combat would increase the amount of sex happening "outside the wire."
6. Men do not women fighting with them in combat situations.
7. Women have weaker emotional states and could "lose it" during a battle.
8. Women do not have brains equipped for battle.
9. Women could be used against men if captured.

Spouses provided many other reasons they were against this integration, but all are some form of the previously stated reasons.

Now, with the other side represented in opposition to my own view, I still see some issues with the other side.

First, women may not have equal strength, that's true. The only way to test their strength and stamina is to allow them to train as the men do and test them on it. That means there would no longer be differing PT requirements for men and women in combat branches. Men and women would be held to the same standard. This also encompasses the argument that women wouldn't be able to drag a man to safety. If she can pass the other standards the men do, then she will be able to do just as well. I'm sure that a lot of soldiers are not strong enough to pull a 200 or 250 pound male to safety. But then again, there is that little thing called adrenaline. This also relates to womens' minds not being able to handle combat or their "emotions" not being able to handle it. It varies by person, not by sex. After all, women have faced combat situations, even when they weren't on the "front lines." They have been forced to fire back at the enemy, pull the wounded to safety, and continue with their duties.

Second, the issue of pregnancy, rape, periods yeast infections, etc. is moot. Women already serve this great country and deal with those issues on deployments. I will agree that a lot of the female deployments may not require as much physical strength as the combat ones would, but I'm sure females would understand how to deal with their biological issues.

Third, just because women are serving with men does not mean they will be anymore distracted than they already are. When husbands, boyfriends, fathers, and brothers are deployed, their mind could be on home rather than on the mission (I'm not saying all, but some). A woman serving in a male unit would not necessarily create more distraction since she could be just as focused as they are. Also, what about if there is a homosexual relationship between two men fighting together (yes, this is something that must be considered with the repeal of Don't Ask, Don't Tell)? They could most certainly be just as distracted.

Just because women are serving in combat units does not mean the sexual relationships will increase in the conflict zones. I doubt men are looking to have a sexual relationship when they are on missions or running maneuvers. By suggesting that, it means that non-combat branches have higher issues of sexual relationships. I'd like to remind some people that the bases in the Middle East consist of both men and women, whether or not the men are combat arms. Women are still around. Yes, I understand the relationships happen now, but they also happen while everyone is back on the base. Being "outside the wire" would most likely decrease the sexual relationships. I mean, what is the guy going to say, "Hey baby, wanna go check out my tank?" Also, suggesting this will increase sexual relationships is a slap in the face to female soldiers. It's as if someone is saying all female soldiers are sluts, which they aren't. These women must agree to the relationship for there to be one. Women won't want to give anyone an excuse to end their participation in combat, so why would they push the limit?

Another point brought up by many women is that men would have a natural tendency to protect them. It's a valid point, but could also be said for all male units. What if two males are in a romantic relationship? What if two males are best friends (not romantically)? By saying men would have a natural tendency to save the female is like saying they're going to want to save their partner or best friend first, which I highly doubt is the case. Energy would be focused equally on both sexes.

Some are concerned with the draft, assuming that since men fight in combat and can be drafted, then women would be too. That is highly unlikely as the government would not want to be responsible for unwillingly pulling a mother and a father from their family to fight a war.

The only slightly good argument people seem to make is women being used against men if captured. That is a high possibility, but would also require additional training for the males in combat units. They would need to understand the focus is on the mission, not the person. Women would also need to understand that their life as a female would not be viewed as any higher than a male's life.

I won't even touch the "men don't want women fighting in combat units." They didn't want blacks either, but that changed too.

So, what do you think? Should women be allowed to fight in combat? Before you post your own response, please be courteous and do not name call, leave snide remarks, or biting sarcasm. I understand this is a controversial issue, but everyone deserves respect.

So . . . Have at it.

"A woman is like a teabag. You don't know how strong she is until you put her in hot water." - Eleanor Roosevelt

Image by: Impact Lab

Day 83: Next Holiday Package!

2011-01-20T17:21:00.003-06:00

With Valentine's Day approaching, along with the extended time in mailing packages, I decided to start the Mr.'s next package to send out with plenty of time.

Over Christmas, I sent him his first decorated package. I lined the box with Christmas colors and filled it with Christmas items. You can read and view the pictures here.

Like last time, I can't say too much about what I'm sending him, since he doesn't know what will be in it! I can, however, say it's going to be a lot like his last box. I have a lot of fun filling them! This is will be our first Valentine's Day apart since we've been together, so I wanted to do something extra special. Fortunately, he gets some of those cookies I made!

On the downside, I've caught some kind of bug. After weeks of saying how I avoided the sicknesses that everyone else has been getting, I've come down with one. If there is anything worse than being sick, it's being sick when you're alone. I spent a lot of yesterday and today sleeping. I just want someone to bring me soup! Ha ha. Luckily I have the puppy to cuddle with, so she's taking good care of my sanity.

We're starting to get word on his R&R, but I won't get my hopes up until he is in the airport waiting on his flight. If the Army has taught me anything, it's that plans are never final.

I Am No Longer "the Troubled Baker"

2011-01-16T15:30:00.009-06:00

I used to be really bad at baking. And when I say that, I mean I was really bad at it. I love cake, pie, cookies, brownies, etc, but if it didn't come out of a box, there was no way it would come successfully out of my oven. When I say I was unsuccessful, I don't mean things tasted bad, because there was never anything to eat. They were either fused together or burnt. And I mean that literally.

People have tried to "console" my animosity toward my baking by saying "well, maybe it's your oven. They're all different." Or, "maybe you just didn't measure exactly right." While I appreciate the kind words and support, I'm pretty sure it wasn't my oven and I know I always measure correctly. Whenever I had my baking mishaps, I would try again. It wasn't as if I would quit after one go.

When the Mr. was at Fort Sill last year, I wasn't going to be able to visit him, so I decided to do a nice care package. I sent him some books he wanted, a nice card, and thought I would bake him cookies. I decided on Peanut Butter cookies and Chocolate Chip. I mean, most people like those kind, don't they? And if most people like them, it means they're made more. Which means I might have more success.

I went to the store and got all my ingredients, made sure I was measuring correctly, and mixed away. I started with the Peanut Butter ones. I put them on the cookie sheet like the recipe said. Only a couple minutes into my baking, I started to smell something burning. I opened the oven to find one huge, monster cookie where I should have had six normal sized cookies. The cookie actually cooked over the cookie sheet and was now cooking on the bottom of my oven. And it was on fire. I had to quickly pull out the sheet and throw some water on the flames. I tried another tray of cookies, but they still cooked together. So I gave up on those. I then tried the Chocolate Chip and they were okay, except that my smoke alarm went off every time I opened the oven door.

I still sent the Mr. a few cookies, but I felt utterly defeated and vowed to never bake again. It was by far the worst baking experience.

Fast forward to two weeks ago and I baked Whoopie Pies from scratch with my best friend, Jenny. And they were actually good. And not burnt. And I didn't have any flames or monster Whoopie Pies.

Because of that recent success, I decided I would bake cookies today. By myself. Peanut Butter cookies, no less. When I created my "Deployment Goals" list, I added purchasing and filling a recipe box, which means that I want to fill it with things I successfully make. I was a little nervous because of my last disaster, so I was very careful to use the correct ingredients and measure perfectly. Except I was low on a lot of ingredients. I did the math and figured out how I could still bake them for a mini dinner party tonight.

I'm happy to say they turned out great and taste pretty good! I don't think I'll be embarrassed to share them with other people!

Here are some photos to get your mouth watering and tummy growling (hopefully) :

So what about you? Have you had any bad baking experiences? What are your favorite cookies?

Day 73: I'm back!

2011-01-10T15:47:00.003-06:00

I'm back in LA and ready to continue with the blogging! I stopped the day before I left PA in order to spend the last day with my family. It was so wonderful being with them and spending time with all my relatives. With my father being a military brat and my mom's brother serving, they were extremely understanding of how I was feeling, even if they never dealt with their spouse being gone. The month flew by, so I was grateful to have that time.

On the 30th, I began my journey back to LA with my best friend, Jenny. I've written about her many times before. We've been friends for over 15 years. The drive takes about 21 hours, which made it great to have a co-pilot. We stopped in every state to hit rest stops and I loved how the further south we drove, the warmer it got! I was moving from temperatures in the 20s to the 50s when we stopped for the night in Birmingham. We stayed at a great hotel that was also affordable.

We made it to LA on the 31st in the early afternoon, giving me time to unload the car, clean (apparently my cat decided her new favorite place to lay was on the kitchen counters), and get some minimal shopping done. I went out for dinner with Jenny and another friend from the post. I was the DD and the restaurant gave me my sodas for free since the other two were drinking. Helped save some money! We watched the ball drop on the East coast and were in bed by the time midnight rolled around here. It was such a long day!

Jenny stayed for the week and we had a lot of fun! She loved learning about the Army and seeing the post. She also got to meet my best friends from down here. She also helped me cook Whoopie pies and we even made fresh pasta! It was a lot of fun!

She went back to PA on Thursday and I decided to take the weekend to re-group. After spending almost two months with other people, it felt weird to be alone again. I find it funny, because I was looking forward to being home and along again, but when the time came, it was awkward. I had to get used to it all over again.

I've been able to talk to the Mr. fairly often through the last few weeks and it's been great. Every time he would leave for his weekend drills, or for long bouts of training, I would write him a letter or make him a card. Before he left for deployment, I wrote him one of my usual letters. Last night he told me how he carries it with him on every mission. I thought it was sweet, even if others find it to be a little corny.

Now that I'm back, it's time to start on my Deployment goals! Have any of you ever made those kind of goals?

Day 60: Still a long, long way to go.

2010-12-28T08:38:00.003-06:00

Tomorrow it will be exactly two months since the Mr. left. And only one more day before I return to LA.

I've enjoyed my stay in PA. Spending time with my family was much more comforting than spending it alone in LA. I was able to catch up with friends from high school and college, but I could also see all my family due to the two holidays. My time home FLEW! I wouldn't say I did that many fun things, but I had enough going on that I wasn't wallowing in my own sorrow.

As I mentioned before, since moving to LA, I lost a lot of friends in PA. I tried keeping in touch, but it seems a lot of people just didn't want to keep up with the work. Fortunately, my best friend and other great friends of mine still keep in touch, so I enjoyed my visits with them.

I think going back to LA will be tougher on Sasha than it is on me! She's fallen in love with my mom, dad, and grandmother. When I'm not home, she has no problem cuddling with them! My parents also have to German Shepherds and a cat and Sasha loves them all. She cuddles with the dogs and plays with the cat. Yes, you read that correctly: Sasha and the cat will chase each other. One of my parents' dogs, Ginger, took it upon herself to be the "mother." She always walks around looking for Sasha to check on her. She does this strange thing where she opens her mouth and then puts it around Sasha's head. It looks like she's about ready to bite Sasha's head off, but she never bites down! I have no idea why they do that, but no one ever gets hurt.

Leaving here will definitely be bittersweet. I'm ready to be in my actual home, back with most of my friends, and in an area I now consider home. At the same time, I'm not quite ready to leave my parents and go back to being alone. I'm sure you're all familiar with that adjustment: hubby leaves, so you get used to being alone, but then you visit family long term, get used to other people, then return home and begin the process again.

This time, I have friends I can turn to and who can help me in my adjustment period.

Christmas Recap

2010-12-26T23:23:00.003-06:00

I hope that everyone had a wonderful holiday. While mine was filled with different things, I had a great weekend.

I spent Christmas Eve day having lunch and spending time with my brother. We've been very close for since we were in high school (we were a year apart), so having all this time to spend with him was great! The Christmas Eve service was as moving as always and all my favorite parts of the season were included in that evening: the Christmas hymns, the Christmas story, and of course the candelight ceremony while singing "Silent Night."

I'll freely admit that I shed a few tears on Christmas day. This was the first Christmas that the Mr. and I were apart. We've been together three years and spent a lot of that time in different places, but somehow we always managed to spend the holiday together. My family was incredibly understanding and my mom even said that she can't imagine not spending Christmas with my dad. She believed it would be upsetting. I tried to make the most of it despite missing him. We got to talk to each other for a good hour or so online, so it helped make my day feel more complete.

I had a great Christmas day and got many of the items off my list. I was most exciting giving gifts to my family. I wouldn't care if I got a single gift for the holiday, as long as I could still give to my family. I know my parents were so happy that I was able to come home for such a long time. I leave PA in a few short days, so I know they've realized how quickly the date snuck up on them.

Today I spent most of the day at home. We're getting pounded on the East Coast with lots of snow! I know all you northerners are getting even more than we are here in southern PA. Originally we were to get 6 inches of snow, but I think we're sitting comfortably at 1-2. No plows have been on the roads and very little salt has been put down, but I assume they're waiting until the storm stops and the drifting stops. See, in PA we have a lot of farms, which means open fields allow the wind to blow the snow from the field into the road. Over time, that gets packed down from cars driving over it and gets slick. Well, that's happening all over the place. The plus side of the wind is that I only have to clean off half my car!

How was your Christmas weekend?

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

2010-12-25T17:01:00.004-06:00

I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas! Remember today, as you eat your Christmas meal, the sacrifices of our military members and their families all over the globe.

God Bless.

A Day in the City of Brotherly Love

2010-12-22T22:53:00.018-06:00

In keeping up with my Reverb slacking spirit, I planned to go with my best friend Jenny, to visit the Philadelphia Museum of Art. It's a great museum with a lot of different types of art and they even offer a military discount! The main exhibit changes every few months, so I had no idea what they were showing, but was excited to browse the galleries.

First, if you have ever seen "Rocky," then you'll recognize the above building. When Rocky is training to become a boxer, he begins his workout routine, to the film's theme song. Remember when Rocky runs up all those steps, reaches the top, then jumps up and down because he made it? Yep, those are the steps! They even feature a Rocky statue!

(Yo, Adrienne!)

If you ever visit the museum on a busy day (say, in the middle of tourist season), you'll see many people of all ages re-enacting that scene.

We browsed through galleries featuring pottery, colonial style living, religious art, modern art, impressionists, cubists, and so many other kinds! The featured artist for main exhibit was Michelangelo Pistoletto. He's an Italian artist that believes that true art must provide some kind of function for those who view it (he calls it Chittadellarte, pronounced CHI-ta-del-ART). It should not be only something we look at, but something we can be a part of.

This was the first piece we had the privilege of viewing. At first glance, it just looks like another modern piece of artwork with no "true art" about it (as the Mr. would say). If you look a little closer, you'll see some shapes in the cutout that might look familiar to you. Pistoletto designed this as a functional meeting room for businesses. Around the silver piece, you can see a bunch of chairs. I'd guess there were at least 20. The silver piece is actually a polished piece of stainless steel, which provides a reflection. You become part of the art when you see yourself in that reflection. Now, to the fun part. Remember how I said you might see shapes that look familiar to you? Notice the upside down boot shape? Yep, that's Italy. The stainless steel piece is a map of the Mediterranean Sea. Each cutout is a different country. Where the table ends is where the Sea ends.

The other side of the room featured a similar piece, but it was the Caribbean Sea.

The best part came when we could enter the main exhibit, also featuring Pistoletto.

The two above images feature the same polished stainless steel as the meeting table I mentioned earlier. The difference here is the actual artwork added on top. The dog (top photo) and the couple (bottom photo) are both painted on tissue paper. It's a very thin material that can be difficult to work with once wet. Pistoletto then found a way to adhere them to the mirrors, without leaving any markings. Notice how you can see me in the second image (I'm holding the camera with the white piece of paper in my hand)? I'm becoming part of the piece. While I'm viewing it, my image is reflected, making it seem as though I'm participating in the work. The only parts of the piece are the stainless steel piece (which looks like a mirror) and the woman who appears to be dragging a man. Everything else is part of the reflection.

Now for the good ones:

No, that photo is not taken through bars into a different room. I'm standing in the same room as the art piece. The person sweeping is not a real person, but the creation out of tissue paper. You can see me to the right of the photo. I was amazed at seeing this one up close. The room was about the average size of a museum and there were about four or five other pieces in that room. When viewing the piece in the photo, it looked as though you were seeing into another room. However, once you approach the piece, you discover it is still only a mirror. Pretty hard to tell from this photo, huh?

This piece made you look as though you were behind a fence, but it is still the polished stainless steel. I don't know how Pistoletto did this one, but on piece of painted tissue paper does not go across the entire mirror. He had to cut out each individual piece of the chain link fence, then adhere them to the steel without leaving any markings. I don't know how he did it, but it was pretty amazing to see up close.

All of the artist's pieces looked like this, but with people, animals, landscapes, etc. Some of the figures had their backs to you, making the figures look like they were watching your reflection.

Now, I will leave you with some other photos of the artwork:

Constantin Brancusi - The Kiss

Vincent Van Gogh - Sunflowers

Jackson Pollock

An Altar piece detailing the life and death of Christ
Pablo Picasso - The Three Musicians
Statue of Roman Goddess, Diana, upon entering Museum

If you would like to check out any of Michelangelo Pistoletto's work, you can go here. All the photos were taken by me with permission from the Philadelphia Museum of Art.

Some Serious Reverb Slacking

2010-12-19T22:45:00.004-06:00

So I get it. I've been doing some Reverb slacking. It was a busy weekend for me! I had a Christmas celebration with my mom's side of the family, spent some time with my best friend who graduated college today, and spent most of the day with my mom and grandmother baking cookies! I also completed my Christmas shopping in a few hours on Saturday morning. My brother and I went to our local mall at 0700 and were finished with everyone by 1000. Fortunately, I only have to buy for four people, so that doesn't take very long.

Now on to Reverb!

December 17 - Lesson Learned

What was the best thing you learned about yourself this past year? And how will you apply that lesson going forward?

The best thing I learned this year is living on my own and all the things that come with it. I gradually stepped down from living with my parents, to living briefly with the Mr., to living alone, to moving halfway across the country. Each transition was a bit harder, but I learned that I can do it, as much as I doubted myself at first. I was terrified to move to LA. It was difficult leaving an area I knew so well, to move somewhere else that was so vastly different. Military installations are the size of a town - you have to learn to navigate a completely new area. I've written on here before that I hate not knowing an area. I get anxiety when I'm trying to get somewhere I've never seen. When I first moved with the Mr., we had issues at first, since we had to get used to one another. It was a tough transition at times. Now, I'm back to getting used to living alone and it's been working out great because of my wonderful friends.

December 18 - Try

What do you want to try next year? Is there something you wanted to try in 2010? What happened when you did / didn't go for it?

I want to try so many things in 2011! I made a list about a month back of "Deployment Goals." Because of spending time in PA, I wanted to wait until the new year to begin it. I plan on getting into crafts, like tile mosaics, cross stitching, making a quilt. I'd also like to look into freelance work. I want to write for military spouses. I subscribed to Military Spouse Magazine, but I feel it is mainly geared toward women with children. I want to be the voice for the many women who do not or can not have children. Too often they're forgotten. Any ideas from you would be great!

The only thing I tried to do in 2010 that I was unsuccessful at was getting a job and starting a career. That will come in time.

December 19 - Healing

What healed you this year? Was it sudden, or a drip-by-drip evolution? How would you like to be healed in 2011?

I'm skipping this one because I don't really understand it. Some of these questions are a little out there...

December 20 - Beyond Avoidance

What should you have done this year but didn't because you were too scared, worried, unsure, busy or otherwise deterred from doing? (Bonus: Will you do it?)

The biggest thing I should have done was focus on my writing. I feel like my writing is never good enough. I'll click on someone's blog and think, "Wow, they're a great writer." Then, when I look over my own, I feel it's so bad in comparison. I feel like a lot of my ideas for stories aren't very good or are too overdone. I think I need to step back and really evaluate my writing style and start working to change what I don't like about it. After taking that time, I hope I can get back into writing and do it better than I thought I could.

It's MilSpouse Friday Fill-in Time!

2010-12-17T16:09:00.004-06:00

I can't believe it's already Friday! And a week until Christmas, no less. Have you started your Christmas shopping yet? I'll be heading to the mall at 0700 to finally start mine!

As usual, Friday means it's time for the MilSpouse Friday fill-in, hosted by Wife of A Sailor. You can check out her page to get the fill-in on Thursday to post on you blog Friday. Just be sure that you link up at her site so she can see your answers!

This week’s questions are:

1. What is the best gift you have ever received or given? The best gifts I ever received I got last year. My parents started a Pandora bracelet for me. They can get pricey, but it is such a great idea. As I experience different things, the add a charm. For Christmas last year they got me a wedding bell and a birthstone charm. For my birthday, they added a house (since I officially moved to LA then) and a graduation cap. I don't know if they will be adding to it this year, but I hope they do. I mentioned that I would like something Army related because of the Mr.'s deployment, or a piano, as I've played for 11 years. The great thing is the bracelet is to display accomplishments.

I also got a gorgeous ring from the Mr. It was my only gift, but it was beautiful! Unfortunately, after the move, I lost it. I could have kicked myself for losing it. I loved it and wore it every day, but always took it off to sleep. I plan to strip my room and move all the furniture out in hopes of finding it.

2. Do you celebrate holidays differently when your loved one is deployed/gone or do you keep tradition? from The Albrecht Squad

Well, so far I'm keeping with tradition. I have yet to spend a Christmas away from my parents, so even though the Mr. is deployed, I'm still following tradition. Hopefully, we can always make it home for Christmas.

3. If you celebrate Christmas, do you put an angel, star or something else on the top of your tree?

We've always done an angel, even when my parents did trees. There have been a few years where the tree was so tall, we couldn't use a topper, so my mom used a bow. This year I helped her decorate again and we used an angel.

4. What are your three favorite websites?

This is an easy question. I love Etsy, Cafe Press, and Amazon. They are great places to shop for unique gifts!

5. On your man do you prefer… boxers, briefs or boxer briefs? Or commando? (yeah, I’m starting to get desperate for questions!)?

Honestly, I think he switches between all three. I prefer boxer briefs though. I like how they cling a little more!

Friendship and a Loss of Memory: Reverb 15 and 16

2010-12-16T22:15:00.005-06:00

December 15 - 5 Minutes

Imagine you will completely lose your memory of 2010 in five minutes. Set an alarm for five minutes and capture the things you most want to remember about 2010.

I want to remember what it's like to have a wonderful, loving husband. I want to remember the new and exciting times we had when we were finally able to live with each other after an entire first year of marriage living apart. I want to remember what it's like to lay in bed with him all day on a rainy day, the smell of him, his warmth. I want to remember finding enjoyment in doing nothing as long as I'm with him.

I want to remember the feeling of accomplishment after walking across the stage to receive my diploma. I want to remember the look of happiness on my parent's faces when they were finally able to congratulate me. I want to remember what it was like to hand them their own diploma, thanking them for their support and encouragement when things got tough. Like after my very first semester of college when a philosophy course made me re-think my education. I want to remember what it was like to first leave home and have to do things on my own, knowing my parents would be halfway across the country.

I want to remember my first time living in a house - how I couldn't believe the amount of space we were given. I want to remember first walking in that door with all the thoughts of how I could make everything better. I want to remember the thoughts of happy memories to be made.

I want to remember the many blessings I received this year.

I want to remember the friendships that haven't dwindled since I've been gone, allowing me the chance to know who my true friends are. That time and distance doesn't ruin friendships; people do. I want to remember the wonderful friends I've made through both blogging and in LA. I've found that some women are absolutely incredible and that words cannot describe them.

December 16 - Friendship

How has a friend changed you or your perspective on the world this year? Was this change gradual, or a sudden burst?

I don't think any of my friends changed my perspective on the world, but they have changed my thoughts on friends. I've noticed that a lot of friends from PA weren't really my friends. Once I moved, people didn't want to stay in touch, even when I tried to. I understand that friendship is not one-sided, so I tried to do my part. I think I only have three friends in PA now, but they're great ladies. I've also learned that you don't need to know someone for a long time to have them as a best friend. I have three very good friends (I might even consider them "best" friends) in LA. I've known one of them for six months, but the other two I've only really gotten to know since October. All three are wonderful ladies and I feel so blessed to have them in my life. They're there to offer wonderful support, great conversation (as rowdy as it can get sometimes), and the cheering up that is needed.

Do you have any great friends that have changed you?

Day #45 - Care Packages and Deployments

2010-12-14T21:24:00.010-06:00

A week or so ago I wrote about how I sent the Mr. his Christmas themed package. Now that he got it (in a little over a week!) I can post the pictures!

The first step was decorating the box

Then I filled this stocking with a reindeer Pez dispenser, candy canes, and photos of us.

I bought a card with Snoopy and Woodstock on the cover and wrote the inside as if Sasha, our puppy, wrote it.
(Frank said he was glad he opened the box in private, but I thought it was fun!)

I also included some framed photos of us.

This was the end result!

I felt I worked pretty hard on it. Decorating the flaps was the hardest part! I also added some bows on flaps to replace the "i"s. I bought some cheap mini ornaments that I taped inside. He also got two bags of Seattle's Best Coffee and a towel. He kept saying how badly he needed one of those. Better yet, it was $1.49 at Target!

I sent him a few more boxes since then (I think five?) and am still waiting for him to get them. They're filled with things he might be missing from home. I tried to send him cookies, but I dropped the container when I was carrying them in the house and the spilled all over the ground! I was so upset! I guess that means I'll have to send him the cookies my mom and I make!

A couple days ago I got a picture from him in the hills of the 'Stan.

Obviously faces are blurred to protect those in the photo. Since I don't have permission, I won't post them.

The other week he told me he mailed me a Christmas gift from where he is. My only hints are it may need adjusted when I get it and it's unique. I don't know anything else. I've been checking the mailbox every day, so excited to find it in there, but it hasn't happened yet. Fingers crossed for tomorrow! My guess is it's jewelry. What's your guess?

I hear from him every day, which will most likely change soon, but for now I enjoy being spoiled. He doesn't call me as often, but we chat online daily, which helps save on minutes for his phone. I know I have no reason to worry about him if I don't hear from him, so if he can't call or chat online, I doubt I'll instantly worry.

Overall things have been going well. I've been with my parents for the last few weeks and will be here for about another two. I'm enjoying not being in a quiet home and love having someone with me every day.

My Gorgeous Husband: Reverb 14

2010-12-14T21:16:00.004-06:00

December 14 - Appreciate

What's the one thing you have come to appreciate most in the past year? How do you express gratitude for it?

The one thing I've come to appreciate more than anything else is my gorgeous husband. We've spent majority of our marriage apart, so the last six months I was finally living with him was amazing. Now that he is gone again, I realize how much it sucks living without him.

With every marriage, there are ups and downs. No couple gets along all the time of every day. We have times where we fight until our faces are red, but other times where we cuddle in each others arms for the entire day.

I don't know how I express my gratitude for having the Mr. in my life. I try to tell him that I love him as often as I can. I try to do special things for him, even if it's only cooking his favorite meal or letting him choose the movie on Friday night. Even while the Mr. is deployed, I try to send him a lot of care packages or emails to let him know I'm thinking of him. I hope that he never has a single moment where he feels I'm not expressing gratitude for him. Sometimes it's the little things that matter the most.

What do you appreciate the most from 2010?

Where To Go From Here: Reverb 13

2010-12-13T20:54:00.004-06:00

December 13 - Action

When it comes to aspirations, its not about ideas. It's about making ideas happen. What's your next step?

More than anything else, I want to continue my education. I was working on going to Paralegal school, but chose to put it off until after the Mr.'s R&R. The last thing I want is to be knee deep in school when I have 14 days with my husband. I've promised myself that I won't put it off forever, but will delay it. I've had aspirations of being a lawyer for a lot of my life, but knew I would never make it in law school. I dropped out and decided to go back for my undergrad, but still considered being a Paralegal. With an English degree under my belt, I've decided that being a paralegal gives me the best of both worlds.

What are your aspirations and how will you achieve them?

A Little Game of "Catch Up": Reverb

2010-12-11T11:58:00.004-06:00

I'll be doing three different Reverb entries today so I don't fall too far behind!

December 10th - Wisdom

What was the wisest decision you made this year, and how did it play out?

The wisest thing I did in 2010 was move to Louisiana to be with the Mr., though it wasn't my decision, but a part of God's plan for me. I know most spouses do, but it has been an incredible learning experience.

During this time, I've learned a lot of life lessons. First and foremost, I'm now more comfortable driving in unfamiliar places. I used to get extremely anxious when driving somewhere that I was unfamiliar. I had no choice but to suck it up.

It was the first time I lived outside my home county, but now I'm living halfway across the country.

I learned that you have to be proactive to make friends. Start with your neighbors, then FRG meetings, and then people you get introduced to through those people. Two of my best friends are from the FRG and the other is my neighbor. You have to be willing to talk to people and even to go out of your way to meet them. Don't be judgmental; you have to talk to the person and learn about them before you know whether or not you will be friends. And it's okay to not like everyone.

I've learned that no matter what, I can count on my husband to: be the ear that I sometimes need, help me through bad experiences, assist me in my learning, and love me through it all.

While I don't believe the decision was my own (because I would not have chosen to move to Louisiana), it has been a very positive experience. It has definitely been for the better.

What has been your wisest decision?

December 11th - 11 Things

What are 11 things your life doesn't need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life?

1. Drama. I don't know a single person who will disagree with me on this. It causes unneeded stress and doesn't make anyone truly happy (and if it does: you need help). I just try to steer clear of it.

2. Toxic friends. All they do is wear you down. Fortunately, I've made many friends in the past few months that I don't need to hold on to "friends." So it's time for some housecleaning!

3. Clutter - both physical and mental. No matter what, it can build up. I need to learn to let go of certain things so I don't clutter my mind and, instead, focus on better things. It will help me keep a fresher mind.

4. Unhealthy things. While I will probably keep the occasional bottle of wine (or two or three) on hand, I plan on cutting out the unhealthy foods. I will continue the Yoga and Pilates, which I haven't done since I couldn't fit my Yoga mat in the car! Hopefully I can get my bike cleaned off and add in some cardio!

Wow, I can only think of 4 things to eliminate! What are you choosing to eliminate?

December 12 - Body Integration

This year, when did you feel the most integrated with your body? Did you have a moment where there wasn't mind and body, but simply a cohesive YOU, alive and present?

I'm not sure I fully understand this question (it may be a little too hippy-esque for me). I don't ever think of the mind and body as being that separate. While you need to exercise your body, you must also exercise your mind.

I'll be skipping this one, but what do you think?

A Little Game of "Catch Up": Friday Fill In

2010-12-11T11:48:00.004-06:00

Every Friday Wife of a Sailor hosts the "MilSpouse Friday Fill-in." Because of my lack of blogging yesterday, I missed it! I'm sure everyone else has already completed it, but if you haven't, you can visit her page and link up! It's a great way to help your blog readers learn about you!

This week’s questions are:

1. What do you see your life like in 10 years?

Well, in 10 years I'll be 32, so I'm sure we will have finished building our family. I will most likely be a "stay at home mom" until the kids are in school and then go back to work. I'd love it more if I didn't have to stay home or could even find a work from home job with a publishing company. By then, the Mr. should be pretty high up and, if everything works out the way he wants it to, we will hopefully be at West Point for him to teach.

2. What do you like most about your job?

Seeing as I'm unemployed, I can't answer that question. I've been on the lookout for Marketing jobs, writing jobs, and publishing jobs.

3. What are three things you do every day, no matter what day it is?

Let’s see… feed the dogs, let the dogs out and check my email.

4. What would you do with an extra five hours in the day today?

If the Mr. were home, I would allot those five hours to be with him. Since I'm by myself, I might use them for additional time with friends who are often busy.

5. What is your favorite Christmas (or whichever holiday you celebrate) cookie recipe (please share!)?

I LOVE sugar cookies, but I don't mean those thin ones. I mean the ones that are almost cake-like. They don't crunch when you chew them, either. I'm sure my mom found it out of a cookbook, but I'll post it when she finds it!

My First Wives Coffee: Reverb #9

2010-12-09T21:34:00.006-06:00

December 9th - Party

What social gathering rocked your socks off in 2010? Describe the people, music, food, drink, clothes, shenanigans.

My favorite social gathering of 2010 had to be my first Wives Coffee in Louisiana (you can find a longer entry here).

The NCO and Officer wives of the squadron do monthly "coffees" as a way for the wives to bond. I'll admit, when I first got my invitation, I didn't want to go.

I got my invitation days after arriving in LA. My best friend, Jenny, drove down with me on my southern trek and left only the day before. I felt like I was suddenly being thrown into the military life. I'll admit, I was nervous. I was like a lot of other wives - I was uncomfortable about being around all these "high ranking wives." I was terrified that I couldn't be myself and had to conform to this kind of person that I'm not. Luckily, the Mr. pushed me to go. And I'm glad I did.

I was one of the first wives to arrive and didn't know anyone. I walked in to this person's house, whom I had never met, and sat down with other ladies (who I also never met). I was quiet at first. I didn't know what unit the Mr. was a part of, I didn't know his troop, and I certainly didn't know his platoon. I'm sure everyone could tell I was new.

These ladies were incredibly welcoming. I adored the 1st Sergeant's wife and consider her a good friend. I met the Mr.'s Commander's wife, who is now my best friend. I also met the SCO's wife. I was amazed at how normal these women were! I felt like it was a bunch of college girls hanging out. Some were kicking back beers, laughing and joking. Even some swear words were yelled out. My first thought? I can fit right in. And I did.

We had a Mexican themed evening, complete with tortilla soup, tacos, and all the little fix-ins. As it is super hot in LA, most of the ladies were wearing casual summer clothes. Basically, normal attire. It was the first time I was introduced to the game "Left, Right, Center." If you haven't played the game, you need to learn. It can get mean, but a provides a lot of laughs. Though I didn't win anything, it was a lot of fun.

This is the moment that I realized Cav wives are amazing (yeah, I'm biased!). The room was filled with wives who are married to men of all different ranks, but we can come together as people. I was amazed at the lack of drama, gossip, and other caddy topics. It was normal women discussing their normal lives. The Colonel's wife refused to be called anything but her first name and even commented that she doesn't care what husband her rank holds: people are just people.

And that's the way it always should be.

What was your favorite social gathering of 2010?

P.S. This also reminds me that I'm missing the coffee for December. It was a Bunco party, too!

I Want it Wednesday!

2010-12-08T15:12:00.009-06:00

Like I said yesterday, today I want to share some things that I want for Christmas. Apparently my parents have finished shopping and I'm no longer "allowed" to buy anything for myself until after Christmas. So here are a few things I want. I'll be continuing this for the next two weeks.

Army Wives Season 4

Yes, I'm a big fan of the show, "Army Wives." You all can say how it isn't realistic, has too much drama, bladdy bladdy blah, but I still watch it when it airs and never miss an episode. I own the other seasons and still watch them sometimes. Yep, I'm pretty much in love with this show.

Dolce and Gabbana Perfume - Light Blue

Okay ladies, if you haven't ever smelled this perfume, you need to. My husband always tells me he loves it and I've even got him hooked on the male perfume, "the one." When he was away in training for that year, I sprayed my letters with it before I sent them (maybe that's why I used it up so quickly...). You only need two squirts and the scent lasts the entire day. But don't buy it at the PX/BX - it's too expensive there. Look for it at a CVS. They tend to run sales on it, where you can get the larger size for about $50.

"The Call of Duty" poster

I love this poster. I couldn't make the image larger, but it shows the statue in Washington, D.C. of the soliders raising the flag at Iwo Jima. It is lit up at night and looks like it is black and white, except the flag is in color. It's beautiful and large (and expensive). I fell in love with it the moment I saw it. Where that big white space is under the photograph, these words are printed:

"Soldiers know what a hero is. They watch them fall, they watch them continue in harm’s way, they see heroes stealthily moving in fluid unison towards uncertainty, with no uncertainty. They are the ones who never tell the world how they are changing themselves forever with every push, with every mile and hill, and with every bold promise of sunrise, because those exact a perspective unachievable by the common man. Their reality is to awaken with the knowledge that today is a day through which they may survive. And they must make all necessary preparations to do so. While the world goes about its business, soldiers go about business of a different kind, a kind they are not at liberty to evaluate in terms of right and wrong because their leaders will make those immortal decisions for them. But one thing is certain: There is a great place and it’s called home, and every home needs to be protected. Soldiers are holders of a more acute perspective than anyone else because of the stakes involved in their undertakings. Enlightened to life’s extreme flanks, soldiers know Hell yet pray to return because they have seen worse. But they also know when things don’t get any better. Such certainty is difficult for others to grasp unless they, too, have awakened to the trumpet’s blare, weapon’s crack, or worse. In competition, winning and losing on the playing surface are clearly definable. But on the surface of the earth, the great protectors measure winning and losing in more extreme units: In the lives of their countrymen, in the lives of the ones standing beside them, and in the lands of their home. And while it’s the unforgettable call of home that rings in soldiers’ ears throughout their service, there is a higher call that drives them perpetually forward during times of unthinkable circumstance. Although it offers itself to all, only a sacred few choose to hear, and answer, the call of duty.”

A warm pair of slippers!

Who doesn't need these? I used to have an awesome pair of slippers that felt wonderful on my feet, but now they're flat. I want a warm pair that is super comfy. Don't these look like the perfect thing? Plus I can slip them on when I take the dog out! I'm not looking for this exact pair, but they sure look amazing!

What is on your wish list?

We Are All Beautifully Different: Reverb #8

2010-12-08T13:33:00.006-06:00

December 8th - Beautifully Different
Think about what makes you different and what you do that lights people up. Reflect on all the things that make you different - you'll find they're what make you beautiful.

When I first read today's prompt, I wasn't really sure what to write. The hardest thing to do is to describe yourself. Most of the time, people are very willing to describe all the good things about them, but I think what makes us all beautifully different are our flaws. It's important to reflect on them - it's what makes us better people. With Reverb, it seems we reflect on this year to make ourselves better for next year.

So here are my flaws:
1.) I've noticed that I'm no longer a planner. Since becoming an Army wife, I've learned that I can't ever plan for anything - you just never know. Sometimes that throws people off because they want to plan.
2.) I can sometimes make big deals out of nothing, which I'm working on. No one likes a Debbie Downer.
3.) I can be a pessimist when I'm upset, but otherwise, I'm very optimistic. I'm working on the pessimism part.
4.) I'm pretty blunt and outspoken, which I realize my best friends like about me. Those who don't know me well will sometimes think I'm being mean. I'm really not working on that.

Here are some things that I think help light people up:
1.) Overall, I try to find humor in everything, which is why I think I'm a good person to vent to. I may not understand what you're going through, but I'll try to find some humor to get a smile back on your face.
2.) I'm very supportive of my friends, whether I believe they are making bad decisions or not. I'll be honest with them if they are making a bad decision, but will still support them (I don't ever want my friends to fail).
3.) I'm quirky and somewhat of a nerd. There are many things I'm extremely passionate about that only others who share my passion can understand.

I don't think I'm really different from others; I don't think any of us are actually different. We may have different interests, but there is always something that we share. I may not share interests with someone, but our personalities are the same. I may not have the same personality, but I share an interest. As military wives, we all have a sameness - we face tough situations in the best way we can.

How are you beautifully different (because you all are)? I'd love to read your answers!

Reverb #7: Community

2010-12-07T13:29:00.005-06:00

December 7 - Community.

Where have you discovered community, online or otherwise, in 2010? What community would you like to join, create or more deeply connect with in 2011?

Definition of Community: a social, religious, occupational, or other group sharing common characteristics or interests and perceived or perceiving itself as distinct in some respect from the larger society within which it exists.

The American community is very large, but within that community is the 1% of the American population that chooses to join the military and their families. This small group of Americans is very different from the rest of society. They must endure hardships that very few civilians will ever face.

These hardships include separation from loved ones, fear of losing a loved one, fear of a marriage failing because of mental issues, small paychecks for the lifestyle they live, and never knowing where they will be living and when.

Of course, those are the things almost every American is aware of. Within the military community, there are so many tremendous things: the strong women who stand by their husbands through good and bad, the children who learn how to make friends instantaneously, the couples who can unpack their house in just a few days and begin a fresh start, those who can turn any house into a home, and the amazing friendships that are formed.

I am honored to be a part of the military community. I feel like it's a secret sorority that very few are a part of and so few understand. I love talking with other military wives and understanding that my wild chain of emotions is actually okay. Even drinking a bottle of wine alone is okay too. It's okay to crawl in bed with a shirt that smells like my husband as a way to remember him. It's okay to cry because he can't be here for holidays. It's okay to be angry, sad, happy, and anxious all at one time. We learn to be grateful for so much because our military men and women give up so much - for the good of their country and fellow citizens.

I've found the military community to be amazing and I'm so proud to say I'm a military wife - and I'm still learning.

If I had to be part of a new community for 2011, I don't know what I would choose. I'm grateful I'll still be part of the military community through 2011 and beyond, but look forward to unexpected changes. Maybe I can become a part of the working community. You know, working five days a week, with weekends off, wearing business attire, carrying an ID card or a briefcase. Those kinds of things.

Where have all of you found Community? Which community do you hope to be a part of in 2011?

P.S. Stay tuned for tomorrow when I feature "I Want It Wednesday." I plan on sharing the things I want for Christmas. I'll be replacing Writer Wednesday with "I Want It Wednesday" in celebration of the Christmas season.

Reverb 10

2010-12-06T13:16:00.004-06:00

I first saw this over at The Unlikely Wife's page (she's a great blog friend of mine!) and thought it was a neat idea. Then, one of the Mr.'s friends contacted me for an interview for a class of hers and she also suggested it for my blog. So Betsy, if you're reading this, thank you too! With a recommendation, plus a fellow blogger who uses it, I figured I had to check it out. It's called Reverb and is a reflection on 2010 in preparation for 2011. Some of the questions are really interesting. Feel free to answer them in the comments section of the post! So, I know I'm starting this a little late, but I'll play catch up! So here goes!

December 1 - One Word.
Encapsulate the year 2010 in one word. Explain why you’re choosing that word. Now, imagine it’s one year from today, what would you like the word to be that captures 2011 for you?

Learn. I learned so much this year: about myself, my husband, our marriage. I learned the harsh world of searching for an adult job, rather than something to just pass the time. I learned to appreciate my education. I'm hoping that 2011's word is reconnect. I'm hoping the Mr. and I can grow closer through the deployment and that when he returns, we are able to go back to how our life was before he left.

December 2 - Writing.
What do you do each day that doesn’t contribute to your writing — and can you eliminate it?

I'm sure watching trash TV doesn't contribute in anyway to my writing, unless I want my writing to have a combination of "bitch," "screw you," or an array of other mean things. I'm sure it could be eliminated, but I just can't help myself!

December 3 – Moment.

Pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year. Describe it in vivid detail (texture, smells, voices, noises, colors).

My wedding day is probably the one moment I felt more alive than any other time of my life. I was marrying the man I love, completely nervous, with butterflies in my stomach. I was surrounded by the most amazing people: best friends, my parents, my brother, the Mr. and his friends. Having so many people in one room to celebrate our marriage was an amazing feeling. I got to wear a gorgeous Taffeta dress that was insanely inexpensive. I can't really describe it in vivid detail because I was more focused on the Mr. than anything else!

December 4 – Wonder.

How did you cultivate a sense of wonder in your life this year?

I feel I cultivated a sense of wonder by turning more toward God than anything else. I began putting my faith in His hands, including the Mr.'s deployment and my move. I had a wonderful church family that really assisted in helping me achieve that. Actually wondering about something using the original definition, is to look deeply into it, looking at it in awe. I think God's work is something to wonder.

December 5 – Let Go.

What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why?

One thing with the military is that you're required to move. I left a lot of "friends" behind. I was able to figure out who was my true friend and forget those who weren't. While being back here in PA, I only have three friends here. I had a lot of friends before I moved, but now it's just those three. These are three awesome girls that I can stay in touch with no matter where I am, who actually care to hear what is going on with me.

December 6 – Make.

What was the last thing you made? What materials did you use? Is there something you want to make, but you need to clear some time for it?

I haven't made anything completely on my own yet, but I did help in making ACU aprons for the Chili Cookoff. It was made out of tattered ACU's (the Mr.'s had ink stains on them, so they weren't wearable), some thread, two pockets off the top, drawstrings from the pants, and then we made embroidered nametapes to add to them. They were awesome. When I have time, I'm going to start making a quilt. Or maybe a tile mosaic. Or maybe cross-stitch something. I don't even know yet, but I now have a sewing machine to help me out!

What about all of you? What was the last thing you made?

P.S. I sent out two more care packages for the Mr.! When he receives them, I'll let you know what I sent!

The Weekender Ramblings

2010-12-05T11:38:00.005-06:00

We finally got our Christmas tree!

With my dad's work schedule and my mom being pretty busy too, we got our Christmas tree a little later this year. Normally my family get's theirs the weekend after Thanksgiving and then leaves it up until New Years Day. We normally take it down before our traditional Pork & Sauerkraut to ring in the new year!

My mom was reading the paper today and told me that PA is expecting its first snow storm by the middle of this month. Which is way soon. Let's just say I'm a little out of practice! After the East Coast Blizzard of 2010 back in March, I'm not prepared for snow! I guess it's time to invest in a good winter coat and gloves. At least I was smart enough to bring my boots!

I'll post a picture of our Christmas tree tonight once it's dark outside!

What is your favorite part of Christmas (or whatever holiday you celebrate this time of year)?

P.S. The Mr. had a day off today (they seriously get those) so I was able to talk to him late last night (for him) and then this morning (for me). I'm amazed at how much contact we've had through this deployment, which probably is what makes it a lot easier.

Friday Fill-In

2010-12-03T13:40:00.004-06:00

Well, as it's now Friday, it's time for the Friday Fill-in! Due to the holiday last weekend, we didn't have one and I've been slacking off doing them for a while now! I'm super excited for this one! Want to join in? Head over to Wife of a Sailor and then link up so others can see your answers!

This week’s questions are:

1. If you were given $1,000 right now, how would you spend it?

I'd definitely pay of the rest of our car loan or else put it toward my student loans! Seeing the number of zeros I need to pay off hurts my eyes. And my stomach.

2. If you had to choose a movie title (a real one that already exists) for your life story, what would it be?

I'm going to go with "Eat, Pray Love." I find these three things to be the most important parts of anyone's life. My husband and I pretty much bonded over food and have a deep sense of faith. Our first date was to an Italian restaurant where we both ordered this huge plate of lasagna. I didn't even wait to dig in to it. Sometimes I think that's why he fell in love with me. Shortly after that, the Mr. began attending my church with me. We later became members of the church shortly after our wedding. The final bit, love, is the most important. I don't think anyone can live a good life without love. And I've had that my entire life.

3. If you were a teacher, what subject would you like to teach?

This doesn't even take me a chance to think about. I would teach English. I want children to be excited to write using certain styles or to read a story they wouldn't normally pick up on their own. I never would have picked up 1984 without having to - it's now one of my all-time favorite books. I have this love of discussing what happens in a story or being able to discuss symbolism, characters, setting, etc. Yeah I know, I'm a nerd, but I'm okay with it!

4. Has being a MilSpouse changed how you view holidays or how your holidays are celebrated? If so, how? If not, what hasn’t changed?

I don't think a single MilSpouse can say that the military hasn't changed the way we celebrate. I used to be excited for Thanksgiving and Christmas because of the food and presents. Now, I'm more excited to see my family. I've realized that seeing and spending time with my family is the most important part. All the other "stuff" just helps bring everyone together. Since the Mr. couldn't be here for the holidays, I was even more excited to just have my family - forget the presents.

5. What is your favorite Christmas (or whatever holiday you celebrate) memory?

I don't have a favorite Christmas memory, but there are so many things I love about the Christmas season. I love the pungent pine smell of the Christmas tree, the soft glow of the lights and candles in the windows, the sparkle of the ornaments, the great Christmas songs that focus on our Lord and the feelings of the season, the smell of cookies, the Christmas ham, the way the light reflects off the wrapping paper of the presents. I love going to the Christmas Eve service, when the hand-held candles are lit from the Advent candles, passing around one flame to every single attendant while singing "Silent Night." I find that to be the most moving experience of Christmas.

Champagne Thursday!

2010-12-02T18:47:00.003-06:00

Okay, okay, okay. I admit, I've been a humongous slacker on my blog! Since I've been back with my parents, I haven't been doing as much and haven't had as much to write about. I'm making it a goal to begin writing just a little bit more!

Since it's Thursday, it's time for me to layout what I am celebrating this week!

1. Today I got to do my first official decorating for Christmas 2010! I had to help my grandmother, who is recovering from a serious surgery, get some things set up in her house. She can't take steps, so I did the steps for her and helped her get set up.

2. Tomorrow my parents get their Christmas tree, which means Saturday will be decorating day! What is better than the awesome fragrance of pine, the soft glow of the Christmas lights, and all the sparkly ornaments?

3. I sent the Mr. his Christmas themed care package! Since he reads my blog, I won't be able to list the contents or post the pictures until he receives it. Believe me, I did a lot of work on it!

What are you celebrating this week?

Day #31: Prepping a package

2010-11-29T14:58:00.004-06:00

I recall mentioning in the past that I'm a bad wife. I haven't sent the Mr. a single care package, letter, or anything yet! I'm planning on sending him a Christmas themed one this week. I'm going to decorate the inside and have a whole bunch of goodies in there! Of course, the Christmas cookies will come later. For once they will be good ones!

It's been nice being home with my family for the past week. While it can be boring (all my friends are still in school), the time seems to pass much faster than it did back in LA. I'm a little homesick for LA since almost all my friends are there. I also miss my kitty!

I started to get a little sad this week only because of the holiday. Having all my family around and not having him there felt a little weird. Despite him being in training for that whole year, he was still able to make it home for the holidays (all by Easter). Christmas certainly won't be the same.

Thanks to all of you who gave me feedback about my blog! I take all the backgrounds and headers from other sites, but manipulate the headers to create my own. Of course, adding snow always makes it winter festive!

Today I spent most of the day with my brother, Adam. We've gotten very close since high school, but pretty much hated each other growing up. We're only 17 months apart, so we're extremely close in age. Once I hit college we became friends. We would actually hang out and do things. Today we met my mom for lunch near her work, then headed off to the mall for some browsing. He picked up some cd's and I grabbed a word puzzle book. We headed off to Borders for coffee and some goodies to send Frank.

How was your Monday?

Saturday Update

2010-11-27T11:24:00.002-06:00

Not much has been going on, but here are a few updates:

1. I finally finished my blog design. What do ya'll think? (I'm practicing for when I'm back in LA!) Yes, it's a Christmas theme, but in my family, Christmas decorating begins the day after Thanksgiving. I'm not one for breaking tradition.

2. I through myself headfirst into finding and applying to an online paralegal school. I was approved for the money from MyCAA accepted into the certification program I chose. I'm a little stuck on filling out the Financial Aid form for MyCAA. Anyone ever use it and have some advice? I emailed my school to ask some questions. Since the term hasn't yet begun, I don't know what my classes will be and how long the terms are, so I sent to the school to find out. That financial aid form asks far too many questions!

Along with this, I will begin my studies in January! I'm really excited, since this gives me something to keep busy. I'll need to stay home a little more in the evenings, but it will help the time fly by. With the education center on post, I can even receive writing assistance to really make my papers stand out!

3. I got the chance to Skype with Frank this morning. It was great to actually see him. The internet wasn't as good as it has been some of the other times, but it was still awesome. I feel like we don't always have much to say, but I'm not doing that much right now. Since he reads my blog, I don't want to repeat what I write about - I'd be bored with that if I were him. He doesn't seem to mind and I certainly don't mind looking at him!

4. I'll be attending my Uncle's wedding this evening. It's just a small thing, but I look forward to it.

5. Tonight I'll be spending the evening with my brother and his girlfriend at their apartment. My best friend, Jenny, will be going and we'll be playing a game. Have you ever played Mad Gab? If you haven't, you're really missing out. I see a lot of commercials advertising the game. It's a lot of fun and makes you laugh!

6. Tomorrow I'll be taking the puppy up to see Frank's mom. I haven't been up to see her in a while and really need to make a few stops there. I plan on going up every other week, if not each week.

How is your Saturday?

Caution: Woman Working!

2010-11-26T14:53:00.001-06:00

Please excuse the present state of my blog! I'm revamping in favor of the Christmas season!

Champagne Thursday: Thanksgiving Edition

2010-11-25T21:57:00.005-06:00

I planned on doing this post earlier this morning, but was thrown into the Thanksgiving festivities as soon as I woke up!

For this week's Champagne Thursday, I wanted to make a list of the things I'm thankful for.

1. First and foremost, I'm so thankful for my gorgeous husband. Despite the distance between us while he is in The Sandbox, we're able to talk daily. He supports me and is my greatest cheerleader. He's given me everything (and more) than I could have ever hoped for. I'm thankful for our love.

2. I'm thankful for my incredible family. They do their best to understand my sadness, my anxiety, and my fears while helping me through it all. I'm thankful for the life lessons they've taught me and their unwavering support. Without them, I don't know how I would have gotten where I am today.

3. I'm thankful for all my wonderful friends, spread throughout the world! I've received so many kind words of encouragement and sound advice about deployment, moving, the army, and life in general. You know who you are!

4. I'm thankful for the internet and cell phones that help me connect to the Mr. who is a world away.

5. I'm thankful for my pets who love me no matter what.

6. I'm thankful for God's life lessons that help spur me forward and help me desire to always do more.

7. I'm thankful for my car, my home, the money in the bank, helping us live within our means without stretching us thin, but also not forcing us to do without as so many must.

8. I'm thankful for my education. Without it, I wouldn't have learned so much about the country, the world, other cultures, or about my own determination.

What are you thankful for?

The Journey to PA

2010-11-22T12:09:00.004-06:00

Well, I'm officially back "home" for the next month after driving over 1300 miles. I have to admit, it was interesting, but not nearly as bad as my first drive down with the cat.

I flew my best friend, Jenny, down to LA to accompany me through the drive. It was great having her there for the company and the laughs, though the drive started out horribly.

Driving through LA is bad enough. We have a lot of bumpy roads, many speed limit changes, and a whole lotta roadkill. Apparently, we also have a lot of pigeons. I don't mean birds, I mean pigeons like you find in Central Park that want breadcrumbs. Those kind of pigeons. I hadn't been driving long and was getting off one of my first exits when I encountered an entire flock of pigeons sitting in the path of me getting on my next road. I had two options: speed through them, running some over and risking a car splattered in poo and feathers, or try to scare them away, thus diverting poo and feathers. I chose the latter, leaving me beeping my horn hoping it would scare them. If pigeons are brave enough to land on a busy road, do you really think a car horn is going to scare them? Negative. They didn't budge, so I slowly drove through the flock. There was a mess of pigeons flying away, but my precious car managed to escape unscathed.

I continued on my drive, coming across some road work (that stimulus money added a lot of extra time onto my travels!). All traffic would stop and then a truck would lead the traffic through the road work, then turn around and take the next group through. It had a big sign that said "First car - follow me" with flashing lights. A truck two cars ahead of me took it a little too literally, following the truck with the flashing lights off the road! It seems he didn't notice that he was free to continue driving on the road. Well, I found it funny.

We continued on our way through a bunch of small towns, with the speed limit jumping from 65, to 45, to 55, then back to 45. I was having trouble knowing how fast the speed limit was, so I stayed around 55 the whole way through. That turned out to be a mistake - I was pulled over. The officer got me at 59 in a 45. Whoops. I can't even read my ticket, have no idea what the fine is, and, according to what the cop wrote, I was due in court over a month ago. I have to try to get that ticket figured out. The town was insanely small, called Waterproof. No joke. It sounds like such a made up story, but it's true!

We stopped for the night in TN at an awesome hotel. The beds were comfy, the rooms were spacious, and the shower was amazing. The hotel even had a grassy park in the back for the pets to go to the bathroom, complete with poo bags and garbage cans! We ordered room service, ate, and went to sleep.

We left the next morning around 0600. It was an easy drive, shorter than the previous day, and we were in PA by 1530. It was great. Sasha did pretty well, riding in my lap for most of the trip.

I'm "home," settled in, and ready to spend a lot of time with my family.

How was your weekend?